Embracing the Chaos

parenting.

2012-02-13T08:01:00.002-06:00

I go through phases of confidence and sheer terror in the parenting department.

I'm in a sheer terror phase right now.

Something about Samantha pretty much always puts me there.
This time it's a little bit Lydia and a little bit Samantha.
And not to be left out, Nora and Sophie have their own little things that are putting me there right now too.

I have four daughters.
And they are all in one huge, mushed up, clump.
What's not to be afraid of!?

So, I was journaling this morning that I'd really love some wisdom from on High right now.
Last night was a 'tear shedding' parenting moment and I needed some Wings.

My request:
I need wisdom. Clarity. Wisdom.

That was it.

And here's is what I got:

Rom 12:

9
Love must be sincere
Hate what is evil
Cling to what is good

21
Do not be overcome by evil (Out)
But overcome evil with good (In)

18 (going in order is so overrated!)
If it is possible, as far as it depends on you,
live at peace with everyone.

Love my kids.
Cling to good in them and for them.
Hate what is evil in our home and hearts.

Overcome the evil with good.
Do not let it overcome in our family.

Live. at. peace.

Best parenting advice ever.

Live. at. peace.

Be 'above' the bickering among them, don't let pride swell up my anger when they cut the bean bag AGAIN, it's in my grasp to Live. at. peace., and not be overcome by evil.
It's in my grasp to choose to not be overcome by evil but replace that evil with good.

(and because everyone's doin' it, here is where I quote Ann Voskamp ;-)

"...you can't positive think your way out of negative feelings...feelings work faster than thoughts...blood runs faster than synapses...the only way to fight a feeling is with a feeling...Feel thanks and it's absolutely impossible to feel angry...We get to choose. Which emotion do we want to feel?"

My anger and frustration and fear with the kids is almost always a direct result of my focus on my failures and how they are manifesting themselves in my children and their failures...I say 'o crap' inside and then do my best to scream the sin out of them...failing all over again completing a horrid cycle (or starting it over again and again, or continuing it?)

But what would it look like to OVERCOME evil in the midst of my fear?
Overcome my anger and frustration with Thankfulness, with PEACE, with good.

It's a discipline to be above.
To cling to good.

Live at peace.
Overcome evil with good. (choose)
Love them by hating what is evil.

Yes, YES!
That's the wisdom I was talking about!!!!!

Well, now.

2012-02-12T15:18:00.002-06:00

I have some amazing friends.

You are not going to believe this!!!!

Liza whisked me away on Saturday night to celebrate my birthday, just me and her.

Or so I thought!

She picked me up, told me where we were going was a secret and I had to just go.

So.

I did.

I can be good and obey the rules sometimes.

sometimes.

(Liza, don't get used to that ;-)

BUT lo and behold, some of my other people were there too!!!!

so, we all just sat and ate together.

;-)

kidding.

These sneaky ladies SURPRISED me with a full blown BIRTHDAY DINNER!!!!!

and they even brought a toy for me to play with!!!!

how thoughtful of you Reasa!!!!

Um.

I am not 'easy' to surprise.

I'm perceptive and nosy.

These ladies did a great great job.

wow. wow. wow.

as if ONE surprise wasn't enough...they kept the surprises coming.

(literally, I was so distracted from the initial surprise I couldn't even get myself to focus on ordering food - so I let them do that little detail for me! geez.)

anyway, back to the surprises.

they got me presents.

well.

sorta.

this was one of them:

(and yes, this was my face when I got to about the 5th bag)

a BLUE baby blanket.

did they know something I didn't?

and the odd blankets kept comin'.

Fairy Tale twin sized quilts, more BLUE baby blankets, pink, brown, big, small, quilts, throws, etc....

I've thrown 'themed' parties before where everyone all brought baskets or lotions or diapers but this was weird.

;-).

WHAT WAS GOING ON!?

OH!!!!

the LAST card 'splained it all.

They gave my birthday away people.

Do they know me or WHAT!?

I know.

They are ridiculous.

It was awesome.

These baby blue blankets (and all the other ones) are headed to SUDAN to be wrapped around the shoulders of persecuted Christians being displaced because they simple believe Jesus is the Savior.

(Voice of the Martyr's - persecution.com)

Be still my heart.

Yes, I cried.

Yes, I'm still floored.

I love that organization, my friends ROCK rock rock, the night was magical.

How precious.

as if the night wasn't sweet enough we added chocolate just to round it off.

and thanks for the plates Shannon ;-)

she 'thinks' they were clean.

we just went with it.

Courtney, Peyton, Melissa and Jess - I LOVE YOU.

You were THERE.

You were missed but loved and felt.

Thank you.

From the Sudanese Christians, Thank YOU.

(fav' moments from the night:

-Shannon getting plates.

-Liza knowing I would dress different if she was just coming over for pizza - the original decoy - so she told me we were going out for dinner so I'd put on my big girl clothes.

-Feeling the presents of the friends missing.

-My friends really KNOWING me, I don't take this for granted in the military ONE BIT.

-the two cars going 20 miles an hour on the way there.

-THEY GAVE MY BIRTHDAY AWAY!!!!!! I LOVE IT!!!!!!)

I'm cryin' all over again....
peace out.

the sophinator

2012-02-11T12:26:00.005-06:00

They say it's my birthday.

2012-02-09T09:39:00.000-06:00

Well, my mama does anyway.
And I believe her.
I've given birth before and I know I'll never forget the specific days that it happened so if she says her day was today, 33 years ago, then I believe her.

My RANDOM journal entry from today.
I am not making this pretty, this is exactly what it says and how it says it.

Welcome to what goes on in my journal just about every morning:

Happy BIRTHday to me.

The day you deemed perfect for my mother's body to get me out and into air.

Into an imperfect world.
An imperfect family.
An imperfect body.

BUT - with access to a perfect Savior.

You created me in my mother's womb.
You know my inmost being.
I don't even know my inmost being.
The most skilled mental, physical and spiritual doctors combined could not know my inmost being.

But you do.

Rom 12:3
Do not think of yourselves more highly than you ought
think of yourself with sober judgement in accordance with
*the measure of faith God has given you*

In view of God's mercy~

I am at a loss as to the purpose of my specific life -
You dont' need me but out of love-
You created me.

To myself, I'm just normal. Nothing special.

To You - I was worth creating.
Out of so much love - you created me.

And then I sin...and sin and sin and sin....

So, after creating me out of pure, perfect and overflowing love

I turn my back on you

And what do you do?
Wave goodbye? No.

You die.

for me.

In my place. You died and took my punishment.

My due. My lot. My sin. My nails. My pain. My sadness.

You took them away.

You created me, a second time.

I have been created twice.

My sin is paid for - my punishment is already served. By you, in my place.

The judge gave out the sentence - death for sin.
And the judge carried the sentencing out on His own shoulders.

and I get a new, clean, recreated heart, mind and soul (and one day a body even!).

Created once in my mother's womb.
Created twice, on the cross.

My life was special enough to save.
Nothin' normal about that.
Nothin' normal about my Savior.

My birthday gift, my "created" gift has been given.
It's a gift that will keep on giving every second of my life....

And I have a life to give as a sacrifice, a thank you note, back to my 2x's Creator.

Rom 12:1
In view of God's mercy (His 2nd creation of you)
Offer your bodies as living sacrifices-
This is your spiritual act of worship

This is your spiritual act of thanksgiving.

This is your way to say thank. you.

For my first creation and my second.

swimming....

2012-02-08T16:12:00.001-06:00

Lydia and Samantha have joined a swim team.

Meets are optional.

Which means they've joined swim team PRACTICE.

I'm holding off on those 'all flippin' day' Saturday-full-of-sports days as long as I possibly can.

they love to swim.

well.

ok.

Samantha loves to swim.
Lydia really wants to love to swim.

:-).

we're trying nose plugs next week.

she seems like a nose plug kinda girl.

hopin' that will help.

Coach Kim.

Lydia's two favorite spots:

Lydia's least favorite spot:

almost impossible to find Samantha doing anything but this:

even while the coach was teaching them she'd dunk under the water, come up and stay above water for no more than 10 seconds before feeling like she MUST get back under the water.

oh this girl...

Nora and Sophie?

um.

they have to keep their head under water for more than 10 seconds before I'll let them move on with any other lessons from me.

they may never swim.

finger update

2012-02-07T15:14:00.000-06:00

I think it's ok.

I don't know personally that it's ok 'cause I haven't actually looked at it since yesterday morning.

But Dr. Jake looked at it last night.

I told him not to tell me, so he didn't.

He did laugh an amused/shocked sort of laugh for the next hour.

I don't know what that means.

It doesn't hurt if I don't bang it.

Bummer for me, I can be quit the little clutz.

Moving on...
This too shall heal.

Monday's school plan:

2012-02-06T15:57:00.002-06:00

get up.
start Science.

dissect owl pellets on the living room floor.

(sophie)

read to mommy.
do handwriting while mommy gets project ready.
mommy attempts to chop her left index finger off with Ikea's largest butcher knife.

wait.
what!?

yes.

I did.

key word: attempt.

my finger is still there.

I held it above my head applying pressure while I counted to 200.
Had Lydia get a band aid open.
Sent the kids away.
Put the band aid on as quick and tight as I could.

It looked gross.
real gross.

Called a friend to talk me down/listen me down while I continued to hold my hand above my head.

I calmed down but I kept that hand raised for like an hour.

Haven't opened the band aid yet.
It's almost 5pm.

Sounds like a job for Jake.

Until then:

#1 - we are buying kites for our Ben Franklin study - not making them. I like my finger. Thank you very much.

#2 - I'm going to come up with a pain-free plan for Tuesday. This bites.

the weekend.

2012-02-06T15:37:00.003-06:00

awesome. lawsome. dawsome weekend people!

the girls (ALL FOUR BABY!) went to an all day dance camp on Saturday.

that's my Lydia, front and center, in the purple!

and that's my Samantha back row, purple shirt, just to the right of Lydia, making a 'Big!Big! House' with the white sleeved girl.

(DO NOT TELL NORA AND SOPHIE but mommy and daddy were like 3 minutes late and seeing as how their song was 3 minutes long.....oops.)

anywho.

brought the girls back to the house, set them up with one of the dance camp teachers who we just happened to ALSO bring home and we headed BACK out for more 'just mommy and daddy' day.

I LOVE love LOVE my girls.

I LOVE love LOVE to spend time with them, be with them, be their mommy, teacher, coach, personal chef, nurse, maid and counselor but I'm not going to deny for one tiny second that I don't enjoy days

like Saturday.

NOT all the time.

I missed them somethin' fierce by the time 8pm hit.

But, I love THAT feeling.

The 'missing them something fierce'.

Reminds me what I love about my life.

Refines my roles and gets me all excited about my gifts in life, all over again.

It's the breath of air I need.

It's the breath of air that I don't get all to often.

So.....we enjoyed every. single. minute.

We were totally dorky and worked on a house project, at the house, with NO kids around for the whole morning.

It's something we used to do a lot of.

We warped back in time.

sweet.

And I talked.

and talked.

At one point I stopped and said,

"Wow. Sorry I'm talking so much but you would not believe how many complete thoughts are going through my mind right now...I can't keep up!"

Not a feeling I'm used to with four little girls at my feet each day trying their darndest to get in all 40,000+ words.

just sayin'.

Jake just smiled and kept listening.

really.

it was a sweet day.

and I think we can ALL say that!

answers to the quiz

2012-02-03T08:33:00.000-06:00

petal girls: flower girls (Nora saw a picture of herself in a wedding)

clock bracelet: watch, I know it's obvious but when Nora (again) said it, I hit the floor.

fire crumbs: ashes from the fire place, thank you Sophie for that little giggle. your daddy thought you'd hit genius level there!

"I'm rank" is Samantha's new saying. It means she 'stinks'. Whether that means literally or figuratively doesn't matter, she slips it in where ever she feels it fits and somehow, it makes me laugh every. single. time.

thanks for playing ;-).
I wish you all could be flies on the walls here - oh the stuff I hear!!!

Valentines Going Ons

2012-02-03T08:29:00.001-06:00

I haven't typically done much of anything for Valentines Day in our family.

Not anything that has stuck anyway.

we're trying again this year though.

I'm not a quitter.

idea #1:

Last year I tried to do a table cloth that we all wrote on with Sharpies and I thought I'd pull it out each year, adding 'love' notes to each other.

Then I washed it.

Then I threw it away.

The Sharpie bled and got all weird.

It was sad.

I may try to repeat this but with fabric markers or somethings so we can wash it.

I'll keep ya posted.

idea #2:

this one is going over VERY well.

better than I could have even imagined.

I saw it here, two years ago. She got it from here.

basic breakdown:

homemade felt fortune cookies.

each girl has 14. color coded, of course.

Inside each one are little things I love specifically about that daughter.

They get to open one each morning with breakfast from Feb 1-Feb 14.

Hearing their little voices read what I love about them,

hearing them tell their sisters what it says,

watching their little faces get all glowy and stick like that has been

SO INCREDIBLE.

Love this one!

idea #3:

Their Valentines this year.

LOVE them.

Found it on Pinterest....duh.

I can't stop looking at them.

they turned out better than I'd even hoped!

the girls are elated over them...they can NOT wait to give them out!

be mine!

Quiz

2012-02-02T16:15:00.002-06:00

QUIZ time.

What do each of these mean in 'five year old' language?

petal girls

clock bracelet

and fire crumbs

and what does this mean in 'six year old' language?

I'm rank

opposite day.

2012-02-01T11:16:00.001-06:00

we're coloring the negative

(so, her name is long. she doesn't like to be called Sam or Sami. if you press her for a shorter 'name' to call her by she'll say "SamSam" or "Jo" or "JoJo"....thus, the "JoJo" in this project....don't ask. It's Samantha...we've learned to just go with it.)

coloring the negative inspired them to also do school upside down...

now we're off to enjoy our 64 degree day in mid-February.

also an opposite effect.

now if I could just get through today without losing my temper at the children....that would be the bomb opposite day cherry on top!

winners

2012-01-31T15:34:00.000-06:00

much better ladies.

much much better!!!

19 entries is more like it!

results, according to Sophie:

wait for it....

bam!

and.....

woo hoo!!!

and out of the 19 entries Martha and Naomi, I do not have your current addresses!

email them my way and I'll amazon you a copy of Renting Lacy!!!

Naomi's answer:

Besides God, I would like to meet conjoined twins- which is actually two people. Either Abby and Britney Hensel or Lori and Reba Scheppel.

Martha's answer:

Bethany Frankel or Martha Stewart

thank you

2012-01-31T15:00:00.003-06:00

Thank you Prince Caspian for being 'the King',

John Smith for being poor servant #2,

Mulan's dude friend (Becky, can you ask Summer what his name is!?) for being poor servant #1

and Plum Pudding for being 'the crowd'

today in our Bible lesson.

You guys were great - so much talent.

Truly, so much talent.

Lydia would like to take this moment to say....

2012-01-31T07:56:00.002-06:00

friends

2012-01-30T20:01:00.001-06:00

love it when a friend comes to visit for the whole day.

I feel like I 'got out'.

escaped life.

even though we didn't leave.

we did hit a Portuguese grocery store and stocked up for dinner.

it was amazing.

cooked together, talked, laughed, played.

the company, the hugs, the food.....the bond.

Love you Liz, Claire and Grace....

*sigh*

why can't you live across the street anymore again?

(my picture taking skills need some serious prodding in the rear! not ONE picture!!!???
what is my problem!?)

true statement:

2012-01-29T22:17:00.001-06:00

on an adventure the the Library of Congress, tucked neatly behind the US Capitol:

"Ya know, it takes me a long time of being in the house to want to get out and go do something but only a little bit of 'this' to make me want to go back home"

-Jake Panter

Jan 28, 2012

the library was beautiful.

the weather was perfect.

the company was superb.

the three FBI SUV's and four cop cars racing by us on the way to lunch ________?

the failed attempt to go to a 'famous' DC joint (Ben's Chili Bowl) because we were a tad fearful for our safety in that part of town and the line spilling down the street at 2pm was just a bit much _________?

the random traffic on a Saturday afternoon in non-tourist season_________?

if you don't have anything nice to say don't ______________.

it's ok now though.

because now....we knew that was all coming and we have back up plans.

we're pro's now.

YOU DON'T OWN US! We've driven four hours to be turned away at Busch Gardens.

You can't scare us DC.

back up plan.

we head to our comfort zone.

Old Town Alexandria. Thank. you. very. much.

and we get our adventure fix by trying yet another new restaurant down there.

which, just happens to also be famous.

we just didn't know until we went in and the owner told us so through his super thick Irish accent and jolly laughter.

love that pocket of this town.

really really love it.

turned out to be a perfect adventure after all.

oh...and for the record by perfect I just mean 'a great memory was made' and a great memory was made because I am choosing to erase from my memory all the whining that took place.

all the "I want to go home now"'s, the "I'm hungry"'s, the "I'm so tired"'s...etc...

they are gone. poof.

and just like that, we had an awesome day.

yes, I only got one picture.

I was focusing really really hard to get rid of those whining statements and it took all my energy to 'poof'.

Plus, just like in most of the museums, you can't really take pictures.

maybe you should just come see us and we'll take you there!?

because after this post, I'm sure you're all dying to visit....ha!

once more please...

2012-01-27T11:41:00.001-06:00

ok.
let's try this again.

My blogger counter thingy says 181 people came to the blog on the day I posed this question:

"If you could talk to anyone who could help you get to your dream, who would it be?"

and 3 people actually answered it.

3? really?

181 vs. 3

so.

we're gonna try this again people.

only this time, I'm doing a give-away.

because they are trendy and I want everyone to read this book anyway.

I'll send TWO copies of Renting Lacy by Linda Smith to two random commenters that answer the question.

If you commented on the first round you're already in. Because you're already cool.

I did not say you needed to say what your dream was and you can just put the first name of your answer if you're ~~too chicken~~ not entirely comfortable.

I get that.

I'm too chicken about a lot of stuff.

Baby steps...together...first name first.

We'll work on the last name later.

ok...round two.

who is it!?

(don't have a name??? maybe come up with the TYPE of person you'd like to talk to.)

a little clarification

2012-01-26T16:08:00.002-06:00

very funny.

someone pointed out that if you google "Linda Smith" the first entry comes up as:

A former British stand up comedian

which is hilarious because although I have fantasized about being a stand up comedian (no joke) I don't know that it's ever been an actual dream of mine.

the 'other' Linda Smith, the one I'd love to talk to one day, is a former Congress woman, founder of Shared Hope International and author of Renting Lacy (amongst other books).
She and her organization are deep in the thick of fighting human trafficking world wide.

THAT Linda Smith.....but if I got a chance to talk with the first Linda Smith, I wouldn't turn it down!

Playmuseum...

2012-01-26T15:57:00.000-06:00

got school done super quick and early this morning so we could go PLAY today!

advantage # 3592 to homeschooling - in an over congested-big-city we could go to a place like this in off peak times.

we literally had the run of the whole place.

it's been a while.

oh.

and my kids are older now.

outings like this are now relaxing.

wow.

when did that happen?

not that I'm complainin' or anything!

argh!

(sophie)

I kinda love this little girl...

2012-01-25T11:33:00.000-06:00

I found her outside our house the other day flagging down cars like this:

and we brought her back in the house. sad. we live in a world where I can't let her do that. but, it didn't squash her. now she is drawing pictures and wants to sell them to raise enough money to buy a house for the homeless guy we bought a sandwich for the other day. the one who was scream the 'f' word at people when they walked by without giving him money. oi'. I thought it was funny. no clue what his path has been. I figured he was just grumpy and needed a sandwich so that's what I did. Lydia dreams bigger. challenging? uh...yeah.

_____________________________

Wanna Answer a Question with me?

I read it on another blog today and thought it would be fun to actually answer it with my peeps.

here it is:

"If you could talk to anyone who could help you get to your dream, who would it be?"

(no need to say what your dream is, but we're talking your BIG dream...the one you shove aside all the time...the one you think you're too old for...the impossible dream...that one. Ok, now answer)

My answer:

Linda Smith

(wow...that was scary just to type! don't leave me hangin'...type it even if you're scared!)

idea?

2012-01-24T15:21:00.001-06:00

so...I want to do this:

KWAV

and I had to share in case you wanted to do it too!!!

Ben Franklin FUN!

2012-01-24T11:06:00.004-06:00

Who is rich? He that rejoices in his Portion.

Franklin City Scape

post office, hospital, library, fire station and sanitation department

Diligence is the mother of good luck.

beeswax candles

because Ben spent most of his childhood helpin' out dad in the candle and soap shop

Virtue and a Trade, are a Child's best Portion.

Ben loved to write...and write and write and write.

Lost time is never found again.

and we're pretty sure his hands looked like this:

Haste makes waste.

so....that was all week ONE.

we might be studying Ben Franklin for a very very long time.

and no one's complainin'.

What one relishes, nourishes.

(quotes are from his Almanack)

Love Costs Everything

2012-01-22T17:32:00.000-06:00

got an email from Voice of the Martyrs the other day about an event being planned in March.

passing on the info here for two reasons:

#1 - maybe you could get your church to be a host church?

#2 - maybe you could go watch it and get a friend to go with you?

watch the trailer HERE with me and then let's go do something about it!

oh crap....

2012-01-22T17:08:00.002-06:00

my ninja's have gone soft...

2012-01-21T16:08:00.002-06:00

...they've turned into bunnies.

"snow bunnies" that is.

Cauliflower Crust Pizza

2012-01-20T09:22:00.002-06:00

tried a new recipe last night.

it was a hit all around so I'm being a good friend and passing it along.

originally discovered on a friends Pintrest board, of course!

but really, it's from HERE.

this was what was left of our version:

well, until daddy came home.

We kept it totally vegetarian but meat could be easily added and it's pictured on the link above with meat on it.

I try pretty hard to be weekday vegetarians.

Another way I put it is that Jake and I are 'Social Meat Eaters'.

(why? we pretty much only eat organic/grass fed/free range/local meat and that crap is expensive....so we just don't eat it. deep. I know.)

and here is how Nora feels about olives, just because I knew you all were wondering:

note to self:

that was WAY too much cheese to eat right before Yoga....oops.

ninja power

2012-01-19T15:16:00.000-06:00

Me (yelling up the stairs): Everyone get in the car please! We need to go to the store!!

Them (popping out of various rooms): OK Mama! But can we go like this:

Me: Sure, I was actually hoping some Ninjas would go to protect us.

and sure enough....they did.

I even accidentally ran over the pink ninjas cape a few times with the cart.

oops!

this beautiful girl's beautiful mind

2012-01-18T13:29:00.000-06:00

~I have been finding this 'recepy' around the house for a week or so.

~She's been making copies for all my friends.

~I surprised her one day and told her we were actually going to test her creation out.

~She is very very convinced that no one else has EVER though of doing this before ;-)

~this girl is beautiful I tell ya, inside and out.

~her choice, she wanted Samantha to be just as much a part of the process as she was.

~and it was so yummy!!!

just for silly

2012-01-18T07:56:00.002-06:00

if homeschool humor offends you or ruffles unnecessary feathers, don't watch this.
it is meant to just be silly and for fun.

shoot....I could have made this video - the 'shy' one is something I have said for YEARS!
he stole my line...I'm just sayin'.

lately

2012-01-17T13:54:00.000-06:00

I'm reading:
fiction (sort of): Fair is the Rose by Liz Curtis Higgs
(trilogy. retelling of the Jacob and Esau story. set in Scottish Highlands in 1700's....g. double O. D!)

nonfiction: Erasing Hell by Francis Chan
(not like Crazy Love or Forgotten God...at all...but still good.)

I'm listening to:
Mindy Gledhill

Chelsea Moon and Uncle Daddy

Mute Math

NeedtoBreathe (just bought tickets to see them again!!!)

I'm eating:
too much.
that's all I'm gonna say.

and I can't link this (yet?) but in this months copy of Better Homes and Gardens there is a recipe for Banana Split Upside Down Pie and I have it on good authority that the chocolate pie crust, homemade chocolate custard filling, homemade whip cream, homemade chocolate espresso gravy and bananas are an incredible combination. And if you look for evidence of this desert in my home....you will be disappointed. My brother's family and my family demolished it last night. So sorry....for you.

I'm exercising:
at Bikram Yoga...aka Hot Yoga....aka Stupid Yoga.
I had my MRI results follow up appointment on Nov 22.
It's a dumb and typical TriCare/Military healthcare story.
The end result was to send me BACK to physical therapy and get me to stretch more.
To which I gave them 'the bird' on the way out to my car.
I went to physical therapy for 17 weeks and 'tried to stretch' while I watched the PT's throw up their hands and say, "I have no idea".

They gave me three months.
I had a better idea.

Yoga stretches.
Hot yoga supports all your muscles while you stretch because you are basically on fire/warmed up. (105 degree room for 90 min's)
It's gross but it's addicting.
They claim that doing their Yoga your body can actually get rid of arthritis and bursitis and labral tears and tendonitis....I just happen to have all four so I'll let ya know if they are right.

I'm going 3-4 times a week.
At 8:15pm.

In three months I'm going back to see what they say.
I'll be nice.
I promise.

I'm just over a month in and I can already tell a difference.
It's not huge but it's there.

I'm dreaming about:

where God is sending us next.
things are weird right now with the Air Force.
I'm just now feeling settled here (it's taken me longer here because of the intensity of this place) and now things are weird.

don't go getting worried...the Air Force is just being weird and it's making me dream and wonder, that's all.

I'm learning:
still learning photography stuff....SO much to learn...the more I learn the more I know I don't know.

also learning the guitar as I 'teach' the girls with our DVD and Christmas guitar.
I know the C cord, G7 cord and G cord.
(and so do my five year olds....which tells you how simple they are to learn ;-).

stand amazed people.
stand amazed.

I know... you all were dying to know that information.
well, there you go.

days like today.

2012-01-17T13:26:00.001-06:00

days like today I can breathe.

days like today we stay in our pj's...all day.

days like today I don't even look at or care about my to do list.

days like today we take as long as we want to finish and enjoy school.

days like today we make new CD's from our iTunes library for the car.

days like today we write letters to prisoners in China, because we love them and don't want to take today for granted. (do this with us?)

a day like today we haven't had for a very long time.
and we probably won't again for a while.
really, I need a day like this every week.
(Probably what God means by "Rest on the seventh day"....need to pray about this. The weekend may not be our best shot at a true Sabbath.)

days like today we let our minds wander and dream.
(which means I spend all day asking God 'why?' but I digress)

days like today I remember to pray for so many people.

days like today I kiss my kids and never raise my voice out of turn.

Christmas is over for the year, New Years has come and gone, a large family trip is now under our belt, several visits with more out of town family have graced our past two weeks and so now what we have is....

a day like today.

thank You Jesus.
my heart overfloweth.....

now for some real life.

2012-01-11T11:55:00.003-06:00

I have a cold.
Sunday, the cold had me flat on my back almost unable to get up (except somehow I got the school room and guest room clean?? what gives?)
It's raining today.
It's a full moon week.
Because of the cold I haven't been able to exercise all week.
I gained 5lbs in Texas.

I'm lovely right now, down right hilarious....really, don't call me if you need a pick me up...just ask the girls.

I'm weird and weepy, ya know, a girl.
And there are five girls in this house right now.
Together we are a big 'ol mess.

I'm enjoying time with family soooo much.
So much.

But all that 'life stuff' is just looming and scratching.
Maybe the family could just stay forever and I won't have to ever do any of that 'stuff'?

We are attempting to restart school after our Christmas break this week.
It's going but it's like we are on a really really bad Nebraska highway - potholes and mud puddles galore I tell ya.

I'm not depressed or losing sight of my gifts....just weird today.

Like, I just want to keep typing so I don't have to get up and go be an adult, controlling my emotions and being productive and remembering Christ....

ok, anyway...here I go.

my goodness.

2012-01-11T11:49:00.000-06:00

As IF a whole week in Texas with family wasn't spoiling us enough now we are getting to spend this week with MORE family.

On our way to Texas last week we got the call that we were going to get to see my brother and his family as soon as we got home.

WHAT!?

His beautiful wife just happens to be from this area.

Her amazing grandmother passed away just before Christmas and the Army was very generous to them.

They all got to come be here for the services and be with family for three weeks!

Bittersweet.

We are stealing as much time with them as we can.....

seriously, we are feeling overly overly spoiled.

(reminder: my brother's oldest daughter is 8 days older than Samantha and his youngest...ALSO TWINS....are three weeks younger than Nora and Sophie......I'll let that sink in for a minute....)

Lydia, Gabriella, Sophie, Hailey, Nora

Samsam and Aunt Lindsey (see, I told you she was beautiful!)

my 'little' big bro' and Lindsey

Gabriella (aka Gabba) -one of the twins

Hailey - one of the twins

Sierra and Lydia putting on one of MANY shows we've enjoyed this week

warning: I'll be in mourning next week when we are back to our normal military life with NO family around.

anyone wanna come and visit???

what is THIS stuff.

2012-01-10T12:42:00.001-06:00

not gonna lie.

I was thoroughly enjoying our 60 degree winter.

good news though.

it's back today!

phew!

that's all folks....

2012-01-09T21:42:00.001-06:00

and this concludes our Christmas trip 2011 update!

until next time ya'll!

adults just bein' kids in Texas

2012-01-09T21:22:00.001-06:00

so...I was looking through the pictures trying to find all the random adult only pictures and it was almost impossible.

which I love.

because it shows exactly how much this family LOVES kids.

every single one of Jake's family members are mesmerized by children -

HUGE huge huge blessing.

it's what makes these trips so incredible for our kids!

not only are they family but they adore our most precious treasures.....

(and there's another little precious treasure coming in May courtesy of this lovely gal!!!! we are sooooo excited!!!!)

Grandpa telling his awesome stories....Jake comes by his story telling abilities by watching this guy his whole life.

this is 'Jared's Chair'.

which includes 'Jared's Lap'.

which was booked all week with kids.

love it!

kids just bein' kids in Texas...

2012-01-09T20:57:00.001-06:00

so, our Christmas miracle this year is that no one died from climbing this tree.

I might have lost a few years off my life watching it but other than that, we're all good...

(I know, I know...it's not that bad....but I have all girls, cut me some slack!)

(THERE! There's a T-shirt!!! Noah's wearing it!!)

Lydia and Hannah!

Sophie

Lily!

I don't even want to know what Nora and Sophie just told them....

Samantha had this entire table in stitches for about 30 min's.

The girl is a hoot.

Panter Christmas 2011!!!

2012-01-09T17:54:00.000-06:00

who needs a turkey or ham when you can have THIS!?

3 different homemade salsas, cheese dip and guac...

....fresh fresh fresh hot empanada's.....

...and basically any kind of enchilada you could dream of....

YUM!

the whole gang!

sweet Aunt Kayla:

Precious Aunt Amber:

Cuz' Kristen and her little man 2nd Cuz' Greyson:

her other little man 2nd Cuz' Ethan:

Homemade Stockings!

this part always gets a little NUTS!

Aunt Kayla pulled out some serious Pintrest this year!

fun fun night.

late night, but fun fun fun!

Dear Martha,

2012-01-09T17:21:00.002-06:00

You have been outsourced as well.

Grandma Panter is taking over.

Thanks.

We crafted it up.

WHAT WAS I THINKING!?

There are no pictures of the final products.

These t-shirts came from here - they were awesome!

a repeat project for sure.

glitter, markers, ornaments, snow globes, pipe cleaners, beads, oh my!

Dear Vontrap's,

2012-01-09T16:58:00.000-06:00

You have been outsourced.

We have hired the Panter Clan to take your place.

Lydia and Abigail:

Nora and Sarah:

Sophie and Samantha (or whoever she was right then):

Kristen, our in-house entertainment:

Sophie and one of her namesakes, Mawmaw:

Pictured, Seth and Jake but all the brother's were singing.

It was very spiritual.

(I'm A Little Tea Pot)

Bustin' a move with Mandisa!!!

(we are almost as good...almost)

Amazing Grace with Uncle Jared.

My favorite part about this night was watching the kids nod off in people's laps.

So cute.

We wore the Karaoke machine out but weren't done yet....out came the guitar and hymn book (er...that hymn book sure looked like a laptop but whatev'!)

we may have had some fun....

rare gift

2012-01-09T16:41:00.003-06:00

I consider the WHOLE trip a rare gift and times like this one are what make it just that.

Abigail turns SEVEN this year and we got to celebrate with her in person!

(that is a picture of Lydia, Samantha, Nora and Sophie lifting Abigail up for her birthday!)

one of those sweet rainbow layer cakes!

I have never seen a child so excited about pillows! So cute! The girl loves her comfort!

Happy Birthday Sweet Sweet Abigail!

poor poor dogs

2012-01-08T16:32:00.000-06:00

we are all quite certain that there are three very very tired little puppies in Texas right now:

thank you Penny, Reilly and Lady for being so gentle and basically perfect - I know I have four very thankful little girls because of it!

(yes, the weather was as amazing as it looks!)

travlin' fools

2012-01-08T12:14:00.004-06:00

When asked, our girls would tell you that the one night stay in the hotel before we had to get up at 4:30am to catch our flight out of Baltimore was one of their favorite parts of the trip.

???

They're weird.

But, I love their weirdness.

Their weirdness is what makes traveling with them so dang easy.

When I say we had no melt downs on the trip it's a big deal.

It's a one hour ride to Baltimore.

Stay overnight in hotel.

Wake up at 4:30am.

Shuttle over to airport.

Get checked in and through security.

THEN eat breakfast.

Wait an hour.

Board the plane.

Fly for 3 bumpy hours.

Meet Grandpa and Grandpa at the airport!!!

Drive an hour to Aunt and Uncle's house.

Go to lunch.

Drive another hour to Grandma and Grandpa's house.

Play with cousins until 9pm.

4:30am to 9pm.

Sophie took a cat nap and that was all.

No melt downs.

excuse me while I just bask in that for a moment.....

ok.

thanks.

The trip back was much the same only I was on the verge of exhaustion and meltdown and there was that little 'dead battery' issue. Which turned out to be very very little, THANK YOU LORD!

This 'ol girl doesn't handle those late nights and long days like I used to!!!

Amazing travelers, these little ones.

Just amazing.

(Sophie in daddy's lap)

(Nora upside down)

L, S, S, N

basketball 2011

2012-01-06T11:59:00.000-06:00

Jake comes from a very athletic family.

very.

like, in these pictures you are able to spot 3 high school/middle school coaches.

between them there are over 50 years of coaching.

Basketball is a sixth love language here.

(along with baseball, ping pong, golf, volleyball and tennis)

In age order:

Uncle Jerry (yellow hat)

Grandpa/Sam (red tank) - coach

Aunt Sherrie (the girl) - coach

those three are siblings.

Grandpa's/Sam's kids:

Jarred/son-in-law (grey tank)

Jake (orange shoes...as always)

Luke (black shorts)

Seth (red shorts)

Josh (yellow tank) - coach

always a highlight of the trip to get to watch them play together!

always a highlight for Jake to get to play!

it's all fun and games until you knock your dad over...

brother/sister love:

the after:

2012-01-06T10:00:00.001-06:00

we're back.

been back for a couple of days.

catching up.

blog is on my list.

will get there soon.

until then, here is the 'after'.

waiting on our bags, right before we caught the shuttle back to our car.

the one with the dead battery in 17 degree weather.

yeah.

that one.

(actually, the girls were rockstars..this was as close to meltdown anyone EVER got.

like the whole 7 days.

and the car battery was fine, some guy just happened to be sitting in his truck right by our car so it was jumped in like 5 min's and we were back in action.

NO traffic home....really, we needed that break!)

picture palooza to come!

Here we go!

2011-12-27T05:21:00.001-06:00

What we look like when we get up at 430am!

see ya!

2011-12-26T14:59:00.001-06:00

caught up.
almost packed.
off to spend the night in Baltimore and then fly out super duper early in the morning for some family time in TEXAS!!!!!!

MERRY CHRISTMAS YA'LL!

Christmas Day

2011-12-26T14:58:00.002-06:00

it was sweet.

and perfect.

we started the morning by watching The Nativity Story movie.

yes, it's an adult movie.

but they were riveted and have already asked to watch it again.

so glad we did that!

here's the rest of the day:

my favorite Christmas decorations this year:

2011-12-26T10:34:00.003-06:00

I'll start with my four absolute favorite and end with all the other stuff:

Nora:

Sophie:

Christmas PJ's

2011-12-26T10:21:00.003-06:00

I don't think I've ever been more relieved to have a boring post.

Christmas PJ's

2011-12-26T10:02:00.001-06:00

family picture by the tree failure

2011-12-26T10:00:00.001-06:00

Panter Saga Part Tre.

I have never used the self-timer on my camera.

I foolishly thought, 'no big deal'!

Well.

IT WAS.

oh well.

the outtakes are funny.

which is good because all we have are outtakes.

but that's ok because it just goes with our theme this year, right?

this is as close as we could get people.

clearly I need to practice the self timer.

Christmas Eve

2011-12-26T09:36:00.000-06:00

the Panters Christmas saga Part Deux.

We showed up to the first of two Christmas Eve services our church was having only to discover that it was standing room only.

Like, there were over 200 people without chairs.

Like, the worship team could feel the heat from the candles from where they stood.

right.

that's what I call 'max occupancy'.

so.

we left.

no joke.

twice in one season that the Panters have been rejected.

We headed to the nearest Chinese food restaurant ;-).

It was mostly a take out place so we ate on styrofoam plates.

BUT, we had the WHOLE place to ourselves.

An hour later, we headed back to church, early this time.

Got second row seats so the girls could see.

30 min's in, Samantha had to use the bathroom.

(remember, second row)

10 more minutes after Jake got back with her, she had to go again.

So, he took her.

Again.

Only this time he didn't bring her back.

Which means she missed the candles.

Poor Jake.

Poor Samantha.

Jake didn't think it was bothering her until it was all over - THEN she started to sob.

I was just a teeny bit upset.

Ok.

A lot.

But, we all got over ourselves.....because it was Christmas Eve and once again, going with the theme of our week, there is a bigger picture and we are going to focus on it dang it.

three of our fortune cookies said this:

buah ha ha ha ha ha....

you funny God.

boy were we ready for Silent Night by the time we got these lit!

Sophie:

(yes, I'm 'that' mom - camera out and snappin' a few here and there while my children are burning live flames in a very crowded room)

Luminaries 2011

2011-12-26T09:14:00.000-06:00

1-2 punches from two of my gang:

2011-12-24T12:00:00.000-06:00

Yesterday had it's elements of disaster but I don't want to forget some of the funnies.
Lydia and Nora stole the show.

Lydia:
1. Mommy, that was even more fun that going to Busch Gardens.
We should drive to Williamsburg to see a movie every year!

oh Lydia...boy did God put in my life for a reason!
love your perspective little girl.
love it.

2. My oldest, sweetest, tender-hearted, girly daughter was the only one to laugh out loud in a packed theatre when Fozzie the Bear broke out his 'fart shoes'.
and when I say out loud, I mean, really loud.

Nora:
1. while waiting for the movie to start, popcorn in hand, all settled down -
Mommy, what movie are we seeing?

2. Nora and Sophie get into 'twin laughing fits'.
No one knows what started it, except them.
No one knows what keeps it going, except them.
No one else exists during the laughing fits, except them.
(and it's not funny when they start it in line at the grocery store, but I digress)

This time Nora, 4 minutes into pure laughter, looks at Sophie and says:
"Wait, why are YOU laughing?"

Both classic 'Nora's' by the way. The girl is wicked smart...just a few seconds behind the joke, which makes her an easy target in this house. Good news though, she always loves the joke and we always love it when she finally does grin.

And I love that we laughed yesterday.
Off and on but we did.

Perspective is good.

I just kept reminding myself what it was exactly that I was getting upset about.
It boiled down to:
We are wealthy, taking a luxurious spontaneous trip that costs money most people can't even fathom.
(it wasn't horribly expensive in American terms, I was thinking world wide, bigger)
I am a child of The King - someOne has died for me and I should act like it.
I do not want my kids whining about stuff like this, so I shouldn't.

It was a bummer and a long day.
But again.
We laughed.
If even a little.
We laughed and we got to laugh together and Jesus loves us so much.

Today, it's even kinda funny.
Today, I am officially annoyed with overpopulation but still, it's kinda funny.

Details

2011-12-23T22:38:00.001-06:00

I really could have done without some of the details of today.

Decide at 10am 'let's go to Busch Gardens today'
Leave at 1:30pm.
Normally takes 2hr 15min - took over 4hr today. (which means you insert traffic here)
Get to gate and are refused entry because the park is at max capacity.
Stupid.
Wait around an hour at an outlet mall to see if they'll reopen.
Decide that even if they do reopen who wants to be in that crowd with our crew??
Go to theatre to see The Muppets (very cute).
Drive 2hr 15 min home.

Do over?

But hey-we were together.
I was not 9 months pregnant riding side saddle on a donkey.
I am sleeping in my bed tonight.
I might not have gotten to see 5 million Christmas lights or drink hot chocolate that costs too much (and I might have been/am grumpy about it) but I am not lost in those details.
No. I refuse.

I have five details here with me in this mess of a night and we all together understand there's a master plan by a Master Planner and we're good.
Ready to be done with the details of today but good.

fun stuff...

2011-12-22T13:25:00.002-06:00

...MORE fun stuff that is keeping me from doing the 'other' stuff but I just can't help myself.

It took like 55 million people to make this happen but here's how it went down:

CASA DC gets donations of toys/clothes/gift cards for all their foster kids for Christmas.

They pour in over the last weeks of December and fill up an ENTIRE conference room perimeter up to your knees/hips.

Last year, my buddy Liza mentioned that she and her colleagues spent many hours wrapping those donations.

And I thought, "right, when you could be helping a child or counseling a CASA, but instead you're doing something that any suburban mom would totally rock at and be able to do just as easy"

My thoughts turned into actuality this year!

Liza was out of town, no matter, I gathered some troops and we still showed up.

The information that filtered down to us was that there were 30 bags of stuff to wrap.

Um.

Try 130.

I'm guessing but not exaggerating.

30 presents.

So, I set up another SAINT to watch the girls while I went and wrapped some gifts with another friend.

an hour, maybe two, right?

'cept there weren't 30.

well, there were...plus 100+.

WHICH IS AN AMAZING BLESSING and I spent the entire time blown away by peoples generosity.

really wowed.

(and couldn't STOP thinking about God's hand in each one of the specific gifts for the specific kids.)

and by entire time, I mean 4-5 hours.

we stopped to go get a quick buffet lunch and pick up more supplies at a drug store but other than that, it was all wrapping.

and by 4:30p we were about 2/3 of the way done but not done.

We HAD to go.

We had told the people watching our kids that we'd be just a few hours and we'd more than doubled that.

And if you're local you've already put the pieces together about the significance of mentioning 4:30pm.

Leaving at 4:30pm from DC is torture.

(on a rainy day - just automatically makes it WORSE than worse, even if there are no wrecks)

We left, I dropped Crystal off, picked up the girls and by the time we stepped in the door to our house, it was 6:30pm.

Not in traffic that would have taken MAYBE 40 minutes.

again, a friend watched the girls.

total time 8.5 hours.

which is why I will now always refer to her as Saint Mache.

I personally canonized her so you will all now refer to her as such too, k?

Let's say it together, "Saint Mache".

good job.

Insanity.

Learning experience.
Now we know what to expect, what to bring, how long to plan for.

Next year will be SO much better.

More troops will be enlisted, more time will be allotted, more gift bags will be utilized.

noted.

Insanity, learning experience and a little messy but,

beautiful.

these babies.

these young adults.

these children.

these miracles.

God loves them.

I love them.

this was so SMALL in comparison to what I dream to do for them but it was so special to be a part of.

I can't even describe to you how many times we could almost tangibly feel the Holy Spirit there.

Pointing things out to us, closing our mouths at special times, directing us, wowing us.

that always happens, doesn't it?

you go to help and you are blessed more in return than you could imagine.

I LOVE that.

And I LOVE that I can never imagine how blessed I'll be.

It's impossible and perfect.

hilarious inside joke going on down here....this scent showed up at our mom's white elephant exchange the other night - it's not one of our favorite but somehow we got sprayed...ok, mostly Crystal got sprayed like 6 times with the stuff...and then HERE IT WAS AGAIN!

and in the same package as these puppies!!!!

hee hee hee....

see, more blessings....an incredible friend to share that 5+hours with!!!!!!!

she made it EASY.

thanks girl.

....one more time "Saint Mache"

dancing

2011-12-22T12:55:00.001-06:00

turn the Christmas music UP mama!

love this. sobbing.

2011-12-22T09:43:00.000-06:00

MERRY CHRISTmas.

I'm saved.

2011-12-20T17:36:00.000-06:00

the girls are helping me with laundry.

so nice of them.

Don't let Lydia's smile fool you.

look at her eyes.

the puffy ones 'cause she's just being a girl and can't decide whether to laugh or cry...like for the last two hours.

She also thinks being closer to the laundry helps.

And the twins are arguing over who's skirt that is.

nice girls.

just nice.

see.

they're helping me....

right?

gggrrr....

2011-12-20T15:39:00.001-06:00

just went to go check my mail.
a package I have been anxiously awaiting came.
EMPTY.
stamped: Received Unsealed.

duh.

and it's obvious it wasn't an accident.
it was opened.
someone stole my stuff!!!!!!

I called the guy who I ordered from and he's resending me the package.
um.
that's what I call cool.
and amazing customer service.
and WOW.

so.
I'm sharing his info here.
because not only is it amazing customer service, it's an adorable game/resource for all ages.

Pick and Draw Card Game.

keep this handy and please use him!!!
someone stole FIVE of the card games and he's resending them all.

(and if you're local and you're my friend, your gift might be late this year 'cause some dork stole my mail!)

no joke.

2011-12-20T15:18:00.003-06:00

I have an 8 day trip with 6 people to pack/prepare for.

Christmas presents to still buy and wrap.

A nasty house.

My cards are still sitting here.

I ran out this year.

So I'm drawing some more.

Not 'cause I'm creative or anything cool like that.

just cheap and lazy.

and weird.

didn't want to buy more.

didn't want to get in the car again.

nope.

this has been here since Friday.

and it keeps growing.

the girls are coming down every morning to get what they need.

I'm thinking one day we just go with it.

use a spare bedroom as our community closet.

hang nothing.

pile everything.

dream. dream. dream.

all that do to but really, we're having fun while we're NOT doing the 'important' things.

we're going to plays at the local college because they are $6 a ticket and amazing quality.

laughing my head off for hours at a mom's Christmas party.

I swear I had makeup on when I got there but magically it was gone by the time the party was over.

who knew moms could throw down over a White Elephant.

oh yeah. I was there.

me likes to stir the 'White Elephant Pot'.

it's always worth it.

drawing Christmas cards 'cause we have so many amazing people in our lives that 120 cards WASN'T ENOUGH! uh...blessing!

baking. eating. cooking. eating. baking. eating. repeating.

and

this area might be insane and crowded and packed and congested and overpopulated (how many ways can I put that? and yes, I just mean in terms of the U.S.) but I am loving the theatre options!

(as the song from White Christmas is ringing in my head, "...the theatre, the theatre, o what has happened to the the theatre..." (sing it with me Amp!) gosh that's my favorite Christmas movie!!!)

ok.

back to work.

or.

back to avoiding the work.

whatever.

IT'S CHRISTMAS!

Invisible Kids

2011-12-19T08:39:00.001-06:00

book review.

Invisible Kids
by Holly Schlaak

A call to action from the community for foster kids.

As very close friends of mine who work directly with foster kids put it, "homeless children".
All foster kids are homeless.

They may have a bed (or may not) in a house but it is not their home.
They have no real choices.
Where they will live, where they go to school, who will be in their lives tomorrow....or later today, when they will move, when they'll be forced to do ______(fill in the blank).

Holly Schlaak gives a very real, but not over dramatized, picture of the system and ends with 12 very practical ways to be in that system no matter your time or lifestyle.

These are our 'orphans'.
We are just too ~~proud~~ sophisticated to call them orphans but they are.
Many of them are. Some are not. Some will be reconciled to their birth families but many will not and all of them have been hurt, abused, neglected, damaged, etc... by adults.

They are in our backyards.
They are in our schools.
They will be adults in our community one day.
They are Jesus creations.
Beautiful creations.
And what they really need spends absolutely no money.

Read the book for a great description of what it is that they DO need.
From us.
From all of us.

good book.
very very good book.

I wish I had the cash flow to buy this and Renting Lacy for every person I knew that breathed.

Both would be incredible books to put on a New Years Resolution list!!!

why?

2011-12-18T22:28:00.000-06:00

why do we make little men and then eat them every year?
and why is it one of my favorite things to do each year?
like, I'm up to six batches already.

(batches of THIS recipe.
THE most kid friendly gingerbread EVER.
It's more like a brown sugar spice sugar cookie.
yes, you should go make them.
they are on year #3 in our house!)

these are questions that will haunt my sleep tonight...
that and well, ya know, 'what I'm going to do with four teenage girls one day!?'...

once again, the girls got 8-9 cookies to decorate themselves...mama got the rest....over 70 to be exact.

take that!

2011-12-18T20:38:00.000-06:00

so, I just read an article that said no more official correspondence can go out from our nations capital that says "Merry Christmas"

this news on a day when Lydia got to dance her little heart out to music that

PROCLAIMED LOUDLY

the message of our Saviors birth on the FRONT YARD of that same capital!

boo ya!

that's right.

our little Lydia got to dance by the National Christmas tree, which happens to be in the front yard of this:

and just a stones throw from this:

you go girl.

blast the music, Jesus is born.

ain't no hidin' it.

and now, for the grandparents:

(mom...the Colorado tree was full of....BIRDS!)

you're welcome.

this poor, sad, little tree ;-(

the 40 foot Colorado Blue Spruce was blown over last spring.

this is a new guy - he's kinda little...and sad.

one day buddy.

you'll get there one day.

Jesus is alive!!!!

I'll post video and pictures of Lydia's dance soon...

I was trading video for pictures with another friend.

Until then, here is what some of the other dancers looked like!

a Christmas tour...

2011-12-15T16:13:00.000-06:00

...around blog land for a few projects we've tried this season so far:

(no tutorials here, someone else has already done those for us so I'll just introduce you to them, k!?)

#1 - Lil' Blue Boo Painted Ribbon

(aka tie dying - which we happen to be huge fans of.)

this project is still drying, just did it this morning, but I'm already a fan.

took 5 minutes, the girls did it completely by themselves.

it has wow.

like I said, I'm already a fan.

#2 - shewearsmanyhats - Peppermint Rice Krispies Treats

(via pinterest)

do not make these.

you will eat them.

they are highly addicting and kinda fun to make.

hard for my crew to be a part of.

their job was to stick the candy canes in right before I dipped them.

they didn't seem to mind that that was their only job.

they were busy eating candy canes anyway.

#3 - Virginia and Charlie - Puff Paint Canvases

(via pinterest)

ok.

these turned out adorable but I learned my lesson.

this 'pin' is very popular and all over pintrest with the tag of 'Elmer's glue on canvas'.

dude.

always go to the tutorial first.

never assume you can just figure it out.

Elmer's glue doesn't work.

it flattens out.

which the tutorial says.

but I wouldn't have known that 'cause I didn't go to the tutorial 'cause it looked self-explanatory to me.

which it was, minus the whole 'don't use Elmer's use puff paint' part!

our version:

the girls drew straight onto the canvases.

used Elmer's glue to trace their entire drawings.

it dried too flat and I knew before going on to the next step we'd need to use puff paint so we did.

we went back over the Elmer's glue with puff paint.

dried them completely and then spray painted silver and gold.

they have wow.

they were so easy.

I lu-huv them!

#4 - Art Projects for Kids - Nutcracker: Colored Pencil on Black Paper

(via a phone call from a friend saying theirs turned out awesome)

this one does not belong to any of my children.

actually, I have no idea who's child it belongs too.

Daddy has stolen all four of my children's pictures, taken them to work and used them as THE BEST cubicle decorations on the planet.

So, if you'd like to see 'my' children's versions just meander on by Jake's cubicle the next time you're on a tour of the Pentagon.

easy peasy right?

but, let me just say, this project was another wow!

all four girls turned out completely different and patterned and colorful and the metallic markers were a blast.

because we have a lot of girls here and any project that glitters/shines is our favorite.

this concludes this portion of the Christmas tour around blog land.

we hope you enjoyed your time.

see you next time!

a museum that has the word "dookie" on a sign

2011-12-14T15:38:00.001-06:00

and poop you can touch.

and talking flies.

and videos of tapeworms.

GROSS!

thank you National Geographic Museum.

I think.

our crew in downtown DC...like 2 blocks from Occupy Wall street.

like 10 feet from the homeless guy literally cussing people out for not giving him food.

(yes, we got him a gift card for food. the cussing stopped ;-)

fun?

um.

sure?

see, we're even smiling.

hey! those aren't your kids!!!

2011-12-13T20:18:00.005-06:00

nope.

they aren't.

but aren't they cute?

and where are MY kids!?

kid swap.

I had these two cuties.

My cuties were with someone else and the someone else's were with these kid's mama.

why!?

It was the middle mama's idea (Crystal!).

"Let's swap kids, make Christmas presents for the mama's and then swap back"

SO FUN.

will be doing this every year, no matter where we are.

I can't let on to what our project was in case this mama looks on here.

(but, let me just say, it was awesome and the kids totally rocked IT!!!)

what a fun afternoon Savvy and Chasers!!!!

yes, that is a 7 yr old with my $$ camera ;-).

(my kids had a BLAST. so much fun that I've almost put together all the NOT SO HIDDEN clues about they made ;-)

Graham Cracker Nativity.

2011-12-12T15:08:00.002-06:00

saw the idea here via pinterest, of course.

my girls had a BALL.

Samantha did her own thing....she made wise men, complete with jewels on their foreheads and everything....

I LOVE these!!!!

the tree

2011-12-12T14:57:00.002-06:00

I have a rock star husband.

I had lighting issues with the tree this year.

He fixed them.

He spray painted the wires for me ;-).

I love him.

I love the tree.

my kids are adorable.

here, see:

Christmas Party Extravaganza

2011-12-12T14:14:00.001-06:00

#1 -

Thursday:Co-Op Party

recap:

it was a blast.

my job was to walk around and take pictures - um...YES PLEASE! I got THE best job!

I took over 550 pictures in three hours. LOVE.

Oh, and I haven't been to a real potluck in YEARS.......

no, that is not a ping pong. it's a snow ball. duh.

apparently the co-op is now Jewish. whatev'!

siblings got to shop for siblings from other siblings junk....genius I tell ya!

I miss working with highschoolers so much.....our co-op rocks....literally, they have a band...and they're like, good.

'em are some cute kids.
(Nora: polka dots)

#2 -

Friday:Salt Dough/Nativity making Christmas Party at our house

almost everyone had an awesome time....

oh Leia...I'm trying REALLY hard to feel sorry for you but....

#3 -

Friday night:Jake's Work Party

the BEST work party we have ever been too, hands down.
great table seating.
incredible game.
great location and food.
like, "we didn't even leave early" kind of good.

do you know what I love about a room full of military people and playing a game?
I'm not the only twisted, overly competitive person in the room. I'm with my people.

out of 40 tables, OUR TABLE WON. Thank you very much.
I might be among 'my people' but I'm still gonna win ;-).

That would be Jake's boot in her hand. All part of the game but let me just say, everyone needs to bring a Texan with them where ever they go, one never knows when one is going to need a boot.

(and always have a mommy at your table if you play a 'purse' rummaging game - you will win.)

Jake's bosses and their wives.

Really, really great people.
Some of the best Jake has ever worked with/for.

now for the important stuff:
I used this tutorial for my eyes and loved it (hard to see in these pictures but it was pretty - I used a gel)
I used the sock bun technique for my hair - it was so pretty - one of my fav' up do's I've ever done....so wish I'd have gotten a better picture!
And yes, this is the same dress I wore to the theatre, lot's o' compliments, so glad I could use my $15 dress twice ;-).
Jewelry - antique store in Omaha - bought them for another formal, have used them for four formals now!
And I love it that Jake is wearing a green tie! Together we were uber Christmasy.

I wasn't kidding about the extravaganza, was I!?

Dance Outreach!

2011-12-12T13:45:00.003-06:00

flying by...

2011-12-07T14:19:00.001-06:00

not in my 'normal' holiday swing yet.

it's Dec 7th and I'm a little worried.

we're having 'lighting' issues with the tree again this year.

we spent an hour ripping off all the 'prelit' lights, put colored ones on there, didn't love them, took them off, packed them up and realized the return policy was....well, there wasn't one, so, we decided to donate them (that's how much I didn't like them on the tree), ordered more ('cause Target doesn't carry brown wired lights - dumb Target - don't more people have a gold colored tree!!!??? I kid.), from two places, 'cause we wanted some twinkling and some big bulbs, twinkling are here, big bulbs not, no ornaments yet....really!?

IT'S JUST A TREE!!!!!!!

AWESOME adorable stockings, have been sitting in this pile since November 26th.

Christmas card pile won't stop starring at me, it's annoying.

the lists on my desk are also starring at me, so rude.

the "magic" that is YOU

2011-12-07T14:00:00.001-06:00

a mathematicians view on the development of babies just made me cry and cry and cry.

brings A WHOLE NEW light to:

'...you are FEARFULLY and WONDERFULLY made...'

the speaker uses the words mystery and magic - I use the words Wonderful Savior, Mighty God, Everlasting Father:

(take note, just in case you miss it, this is NOT computer animation, they are actual pictures!)

"so perfectly organized a structure it was hard NOT to attribute Divinity to it"

"how do the systems not make mistakes?" he says.

I know.
I do, I know.
But the answer is very FEARFUL.
It requires selfless praise to a God who deserves the respect of the chance for life to everyone of these 'mysteries'.

Come Thou Fount

2011-12-06T16:25:00.001-06:00

Turn your speakers up.
Sing along.
Really loud.
(be prepared for the kids around you to ask why you're singing to the computer)

I can't get this song out of my head/heart.
It's where I am.
Every part of it.

do you hear this!?

2011-12-05T20:25:00.001-06:00

out to eat:

Me: Nora and Sophie, please stop starring and pointing, no one likes to be pointed at or stared at.
Samantha: I do!

Jake: Is everyone ready for bed? (yelled up the stairs)
Samantha: YES INDEED! (yelled down the stairs)

working intently on a craft, no one saying anything....

Polar Express soundtrack playing in background: "No one will be sleeping on the night of Christmas Eve...."
Samantha singing at the same volume, pitch, beat and tune to the song: "Yes, they will"
Samantha, speaking: I will!

Sophie (with sense of urgency): NORA! Don't spit your tongue out at me! THAT IS NOT SOMETHING TWINS DO!

_____________________________________________________________________________

I am so bad about writing these down, seriously, my girls say gut wrenchingly hilarious things 10-100 times a day.
Samantha says them about 10-100 times an hour.

I know all kids are funny, but I'm bias.
My kids are hands down, THE funniest.
Don't even try and argue.
Even if I can't actually remember what it was that was SO funny!

Breaking Dawn

2011-12-05T20:02:00.001-06:00

While Melissa was here another BESTIE showed up from out of town to hit the town with us.

Becky (hey!!!), Melissa and I all lived with in 5 or 6 houses of each other in Nebraska, Becky and I moved here (we ran a 1/2 marathon together) and then Becky had to ruin it by moving to Florida!

geez!

But, a certain family member of hers lives in Baltimore so they 'just happened' to be there for Thanksgiving.

Which means we 'just happened' to get to see her.

We might have gotten to see her more 'cept they had a National Lampoons Thanksgiving trip goin' on and it was a little rough goin'.

We all went to go see Breaking Dawn together.

I'm not sure why we did that because it was sooooooooooooooo so bad.

but, I digress.

the movie had about .05% to do with this night.

oh. my. goodness.

I. can't. stand. it.

and it get's better.....

here is the movie crew...

Liza and her new adorable neighbor over there on the left.

So.

now I have another one of 'my people' in the same room as some of my other people.

but.

it. gets. better.....

BAM!

MORE of my awesome people!!!

Starting from the left is Reesa (Liza's new friend who had a good time but I'm sure was a little shocked at all these amazing ladies!)

Courtney, Peyton, Mache, Melissa, Becky, muah, and Liza.

and I wish I had time to write why each of these ladies is 'amazing'....

I just might do that soon.

ok.

military girls.

I need to talk to you for a second.

don't you ever dream about getting all the awesome people you've met all over the world all together in one room or one city and just hangin' out with them all at the same time?

mmmkay.

well, I do.

and on a tiny tiny scale, I got to do it this night!!!!!!!!

**sigh**

seriously, this was a small part of a big dream come true.

most of them didn't know each other but my people are so amazing that I'm still getting calls and emails about how much fun this dinner was!!!

I have GOOD people!

I'm just sayin'.

My heart needed this night.

I knew it did but I don't know that I even knew how much.

Between that and a week with Melissa, I think I might be ready to take over the world's injustices again....

Now, I just have to figure out where the heck I put all that extra time!?

checked OUT!

2011-12-05T19:49:00.001-06:00

know what best friends are for?

They are for tacking on a whole extra week to their vacation JUST so they can drive 10 hrs out of their way to spend that extra week with YOU.

They are for making your kids laugh.....

just hangin' out together.....

being mommies and doing crafts together....

going to see movies that SHOULD HAVE BEEN, BUT AREN'T good, together....

playing tourist together...

spending five hours in the mall with this whole crew and loving it together....

talking, dreaming, playing, cooking, etc.....together.

but best friends are the best because most of all, you can just be KNOWN with them.

there's a level of comfort, support and peace that comes with friends like these -

ah.....

and because I was so comfortable, supported and at peace, I kinda checked out of life.

I did close to seven loads of laundry (we have one of those huge machines) after they left and I smiled through them all remembering why it was that I'd checked out.

If I wasn't here, didn't answer an email or skipped out on responsibilities....I'm not sorry.

It was a beautiful time, we all needed it!

pick me up

2011-12-02T14:51:00.001-06:00

all girls...go HERE and read NOW!!!

I'm not into 'girl power', I'm not a feminist, but I LOVE who God has created in a woman.

The Nutcracker.

2011-11-30T14:17:00.001-06:00

a local dance studio was giving away free tickets to go see the Nutcracker.

so. we did.

and it was perfect!

girl trip. no boys allowed.

but we still missed him!

my girls are all 'into' stuff like this.

makes this mama's heart happy!!!

Thanksgiving 2011

2011-11-30T14:01:00.001-06:00

(I'm here. We are alive. We are great. Busy and great. Updating one thing at a time to catch up!)

Johnathan and Liza came early to help cook.

Johnathan actually made the turkey at their house and brought it over...

I'm do. not. like that part of making the meal!!!

He LOVES it.

Perfect situation.

just a teensie bit of fun!

last minute center pieces

kids table:

"Thankful For" board

great dinner time conversation!

great company!

mmmm.....

the kids and their buddies..

Johnathan, Liza and THE Thanksgiving platter (that we gave them for their wedding!)

the Miners. ;-)

Shawn, Silva and Gordon

Johnathan's usual predicament:

lots o' food.

little bit o' Mafia.

plenty of Thankfulness.

a whole bunch of really amazing friends.

practically perfect!

Happy Thanksgiving

2011-11-24T10:35:00.001-06:00

can't figure out how to embed this but you MUST go watch this video (with everyone) today!

The Mayflower story...folk style.

Happy Thanksgiving!
Thankful for just about everything right now....

plugging along...

2011-11-22T10:18:00.001-06:00

pluggin' along

still not having the greatest week
just down and discouraged on a couple of key fronts
not good for the mood

kids are good but I want it to be better around here

less selfish on my part

My prayer this week is that I become less so He becomes more....

same song,
different verse.

my *big* appointment for my hips is today.
I'll be seeing a Sports Medicine doctor.
nervous about what they'll say.

I actually made a cake yesterday...been a while.
felt good to be doing that again!
my girls all wanted brownies for their birthdays so there were no cakes there :-)

It was made for the official adoption day of the little baby girl I got to plan a baby shower for back in May - adoptions take forever...it's crazy!
and I totally stole the design from Pinterest....but I'm not gonna show you the inspiration 'cause it would make mine look baaaaad....

Hosting close to (about?) 20 people here for Thanksgiving dinner on Thursday,
best friend rolls in to town late Sunday night, the Nutcracker Sunday afternoon, Breaking Dawn/Dream girls night out on Monday....

My 'light' at the end of the tunnel is coming - I can see it.
COME ON LIGHT!

picture from a trip to the American Indian Museum last week - the one where we almost died going back for a beanie baby - this would have been the last picture taken of us all.
it would have been ok for the newspaper I think....

:-)

(please excuse my whining....we are all great, no real worries, just a little poopy, that's all)

and....family #8

2011-11-20T17:11:00.000-06:00

so fun.

I'm learning a TON each time.

I still have so far to go.

and I feel that each time.

I always feel prepared, I always feel confident.

and then they show up.

doesn't seem to matter, so far, who 'they' are.

it just always 'happens'.

everything I was confident or prepared with goes OUT THA' WINDOW!

and I feel like a fish floppin' on the shore line.

good news though is that each time I'm finished I learn something else that's new.

like today: it was totally overcast.

haven't shot with those settings before and I managed to overexpose cheeks/foreheads even with no sun out.

yep.

I did.

did you know that was possible!?

I didn't.

until today.

so, in retrospect, after studying each picture and it's settings, I learned what to put my settings on in that lighting.

one flop closer to the ocean.

thanks Amy and family for letting me flop with you,

you were so patient and so kind!!!

such beauty...

2011-11-19T17:45:00.000-06:00

family #7

thanks Jessa and Jared!

you guys are BEA.u.Ti.Ful!!!

Nophie and Snora's Birthday Party!!!!

2011-11-18T15:20:00.000-06:00

so many pets...no homes ;-(

yummy treats.....

Sophie on left, Nora on right, adorable 5 years old everywhere.

'FREE PUPPY'S/FREE KITTENS!'

(the pizza guy was really curious if we had some ;-)

swearing in ceremony....swearing that we vow to love them and never EVER pull their tails.

adoption complete, now on to decorating their new dog/cat houses:

and making it official:

brownies...again.

presents!!!!

what a precious time that was.

so sweet.

so simple.

so perfect.

I love my girlies and it all turned out just right after all.

failing at...everything.

2011-11-17T17:15:00.001-06:00

*went to Target at 8:30pm last night.
shopped for an hour.
went to pay.
had no wallet.
drove 10 min's home.
got wallet.
drove back to pay and take my goods home.
oh...and the two main things I even went for...were OUT.
the cashier was so nice, what she had to say to my mishap was, "now that was painless, wasn't it!?"
and she wasn't being sarcastic.
I wanted to be though.
actually, I kinda wanted to punch her.
but whatever.

*Samantha is going through a major dose of separation anxiety. At age six. Not sure what to do with that but I do know it's starting to make me a little crazy.
Short story: lady yelled at Samantha in the middle of Target a few weeks back, Samantha now has separation anxiety. I'd like to have 'more' words with that lady.

*Lydia is going through a major dose of "argue with mommy over the color of the sky". At age seven. I though I at least had four more years until we hit that stuff!?

*I've had a sinus infection for 27 days now. I'm on antibiotics #2. The infections is from swimming. Because I can't run. Running would be so much easier...'cept for that whole, 'I'm broken' thing. Stupid swimming. I miss running. A lot.

*I'm so sick of losing my patient with my kids. Sick. of. it. I can't even stand to hear myself any more.

*We almost died in Washington DC yesterday because we dropped a thrift store beanie baby in the middle of the road and had to stop to pick it up. (we meaning one girl, but we were all holding hands....'cause it was DC and if we weren't holding hands we'd die, 'cept we almost did die because we all stopped to rescue a $.75 elephant!!!!)
Um.....

*I asked the girls what was their favorite subject in school lately.
all four of them said, "nothing.".
great.
score one for mom!

*do not have one Christmas present bought. don't even know what 3/4 of the presents will be yet. not like me.

*On a good note, I thought I was one chapter behind in my Bible study this week but when I got there I she told me I wasn't failing at every area in life, I was right on schedule. (and yet, somehow I still don't believe her...maybe we were just both behind??)

*Our future. probably nothing and yet the idea of what may come soon clings to my subconscious like craaAaazy.

*There are enough leaves in our yard to mulch the entire White House garden. And we haven't bagged one leave. And they are still falling. And I don't care.

*Throwing Nora and Sophie a birthday party tomorrow. Do you know what I love most about Nora and Sophie right NOW? They are kid #3 and #4...which means they are used to 'less' or not my 'best' and they don't care. They are more excited about their party than either of the other girls were and they are getting 'less' of a party and not what they originally wanted and again, don't care....which makes me all twisted inside and sad that they didn't get my 'best' or 'more' of a party....
It will be cute, just not my normal.

*so many trafficked girls out there...so many kids...always on my mind/heart.....what do to???

just in case you thought it was all butterflies and rainbows around here lately ;-)

BUT in between all that jingling around my head/heart there is this:

OH YEAH!!!!