top 7 (is there such a thing?)

Things you don't think about when a husband deploys:

1. kids know something's is up, meaning, THEY JUST DON'T SLEEP. (this, of course, carries a whole set of problems, like discipline issues - lots of them!)
2. adult conversation dwindles to the minimums and no one really wants to hear how many poopy diapers you changed, how many time outs Lydia had or the fact that the nap you truly needed, not wanted, was snatched away because, THEY JUST DON'T SLEEP. Also, it doesn't seem like complaining when you tell your husband how crappy you feel, but it does to someone else...you just sound negative and nobody likes a drainer.
3. food or lack there of. No need, motivation, or desire to cook. Cereal is our friend. Yes, people say "call me if you want a meal", don't get me wrong, people have the right idea/heart BUT I'm not going to call them and ask them to bring me a meal...would you?
4. LOTS OF CRYING. I'm crying, they cry (there's only one of me and even that one is a little less than normal because I can't sleep either).
5. the amount of "no's" you have to deal with. Can you baby sit? Can you vacuum out my car? Can you come dig flower holes in my garden because I can't bend over but I'm tired of looking at dirt? No, No, No. Not because they don't want to..not by any means. People just have their own lives and can't always drop what they are doing, just like I can't.
6. YOU just don't sleep. Who wants to, after not having to for years, get into an empty bed? It's a horrid feeling.
7. People offering and insisting to help that you just don't like or want in your life. I know, this sounds so harsh (unless you've been there). You are dying for help, you'll take it when it comes, but there are the people that you are also trying to dodge and creatively move around without lying or accepting their offers. (this is rare because for the most part people are just great...it's just the 1% of our population and I just happen to have one in my life right now, otherwise, ignore #7)
8. the house is just messy. It's all up to me, along with the errand running, repairing, calls, bills, etc...so, it just doesn't get done. That's depressing. (this is true for my family, I know a lot of super women out there who do it all regardless of whether he's home or not, that's just how their families run...but mine doesn't)

The point of my Top 7?.....well, first and foremost, I was just having a hard moment and needed to be whiny for a moment but also, it's hard to take help, no matter how bad you want it... I have learned in all of this to always offer help, but don't ask, just tell no matter what the situation.

Ok, I was going for 10 and really only came up with 6 solid ones (#7 is very situational, not general)...so, I guess it's not as bad as I thought? No, it is.
I'll be better in a week or so. The first week and the last week are the hardest and I am right in the thick of that. Just hangin' in there.