I have been contemplating what to do with the whole 'home school' issue on here.
There are things I want to write, remember and communicate but I always want to be heard with clarity and love.
I love home schooling.
I hate public education.
I love my friends and their kids and completely understand why they choose public education.
I do not hate my friends and their kids for making that choice.
I love my friends and family who are teachers and wish so badly for them that they had a different environment in which to teach.
They are amazing people who do not have the power or room to do what it is they are actually trying to do. Keep up the good fight, what an amazing role you have in the lives of our future nation.
I believe strongly that public education does have a place and am saddened at it's current state.
My Story:
I was home schooled for 9 years, 4th grade thru 12th grade.
I am not a social retard, I am one of the least prejudice people I know, I was able to explore life at my pace and in my own terms, not on the terms of the slowest kid in the class (who knows, maybe that would have been me and I would have slowed everyone else down!?).
I played sports, LOTS of them, I did theatre, yearbooks, "Homecoming's", field trips, field trips and more field trips - I can tell you how foam peanuts are made, Krispy Kreme's are baked and point you to exactly where Andrew Jackson fought his battle. I know the TRUE history of our nation, I can tell you why people believe in evolution, where it's loop holes are and how creation fills those holes. I am fearless when it comes to tackling new 'projects' because I was allowed to explore and experiment. I am not exactly the most disciplined person in the world but I understand what it is and how to get there ;-).
I look back with NO regrets about my education, socialization or experiences.
I can not say that I have met many people who can say that with as much passion.
That is my story, not my sermon. It's funny that I feel nervous sharing how much I loved being home schooled because I know there are people squirming in their seats right now angry at me for judging them. I am in no position to judge just as no one else should be in a position to tell me that my story can't be told with all the excitement it deserves.
It's like when you say 'no' to someone offering you a beer.
For some reason that is appalling and you are calling them an alcoholic for simply saying 'no thanks!'
But, if they offered you a Dr Pepper and you said 'no'? No big deal. Holly's just not thirsty.
Well, Holly's just not into public education either ;-).
She's not calling you anything accept "capable", "YOUR child's parent", or "friend".
So, what's with 'Fantastic Friday'?
I will limit the majority of my 'home school' excitement to Fridays. That way, if it truly is uncomfortable to you, just skip me on Fridays and I'll anxiously await your return on Saturday!
My commitment to myself about the content for Fantastic Fridays:
There will never be any finger pointing at those who choose or chose not to home school, I'm not into that, I'm just not thirsty.
I will post engaging articles, exciting milestones of our school time, and fun ideas though. So, even if you are thirsty I'd love for you to visit.
Many times things seem offensive until you get to know them and then all of the sudden, not only are they not offensive, you might like them - even if you decide you still like beer ;-) - I'll even buy you one of your favorites!
Here is my first engaging article:
Why NOT to Home school
note: some of you are reading this and thinking 'wait! didn't that say Friction Friday?' yes, it did but in an effort to make it sound more fun and less abrasive (because that's what it is - more fun) I changed it!
note note: I know this all sounds extremely defensive but I figured I'd just get it all out there, now you know and I will remember what kind of 'explanation' it used to take to move forward with my decisions!
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12 comments:
Thanks for this post, Holly. My husband and I have also been considering homeschooling our daughter (she's not even 2 years old yet, so we've still got some time to work it out) ... it's encouraging to hear that your personal experience with it was so positive. You are a wonderful, clear-minded, open-hearted person, and that, to me, stands as a testament to the great possibilites of homeschooling. Looking forward to your "Friction Friday" posts!
thanks for being real and sharing!
Holly,
I find it so interesting and honestly quite sad that instead of fellow mothers feeling "free" to voice their opinions with one another we instead feel fear. It begins from day one...epidural/no epidural, breastfeeding/bottlefeeding, spanking/no spanking, preschool/no preschool, homeschool/public school/christian school, and the list goes on and on... I have often times found myself so caught up in the opinions of others...losing sleep over whether or not I am making the right choice. Here is the bottom line...God has chosen each of us to be the mother of our specific children, with their specific needs, gifts, ablilities, weaknesses, etc... His will and His will alone should be what dictates the choices we make for our families. It was wonderful to read how much you loved being homeschooled and how that excitement is now building for you as you begin to educate your girls. This public school mama admires your passion and looks forward to reading about your experiences with home education. Just because school for our kiddos looks different doesn't mean that we can learn from one another right? Thanks for your honesty today...so refreshing.:) And thanks for reading this very long comment...I guess this has been on my heart...:) Give Jake and the girls a big Texas "Hi" from us Conants.
Jenn:)
OK, so I'm addicted to your blog....I look forward to reading each Fri. as we are a homeschooling family but we have not a clue what we are doing! No experience here just lots of prayers! I'll stay plugged in for inspiration as we face the enormous responsibility of educating our kiddos at home. Our kids are the same age (except I don't have twins just ONE on the way now) so it will be fun to have someone who's right where I am! Especially one who knows the ropes of homeschooling. Thanks Holly!
I so wish I was able to homeschool. I really think I would like to do that and would love the unique opportunities it would give my children, but knowing myself as well as I do I know that it probably would not work (for many reasons). I can relate to what you are saying though. We have received quite a lot of criticism for sending our kids to a private, Christian school. I'm like you I feel that each family has to decide what is best for their children, what they can live with, and what they are called to do. For us, private school is a big sacrifice but it is what we feel we need to do and by doing so we are not judging any one else's choice!
You have been on a roll the past few days. Is that what vacation does to you?? :-)
Sherilyn - I love it that you are sending your kids to private school because you know that's what's right for the situation you've been blessed with! awesome.
and yes, I guess vacation does that to me - stress does also -
Jenn - I LOVE long comments ;-)
especially ones that I can say "YES!" to! you are soooo sooo right, it starts with the epidural!
Melody - how fun, I didn't know you were homeschooling! we'll have to trade ideas! when is your blog starting???
anonymous - what HUGE compliments! I am an affirmation junkie and so that filled my tank for like at least a year!
i agree with jennifer. the problem is (to use the drink analogy) is that you aren't just saying, "do you want a coke?" you are talking about the choice to serve coke or not to serve coke to your children. it isn't about being thirsty, it is about being the kind of mom who would actually serve (or not serve) coke to her children. somehow, no matter what the issue, it becomes something personal because it relates to what you choose to do or not do in the raising of your children. i may have chosen an epidural because i don't like pain. but some mama somewhere is thinking that i needlessly and selfishly put my child at risk (and then i guiltily start to worry about my selfishness and my willingness to put my child at risk).
on the other side, i think that if you have a conviction about something, you do believe that other people should agree with you. i have never talked to a homeschooling mom who didn't smile when i gave my reasons for not homeschooling and suggest those might not be as good reasons as i think they are (as in the article you linked to). if you have a conviction about education that is strong enough for your children, you probably are convinced for others' children as well. that doesn't mean we can't all love each other and support each other in our decisions. does it sound to rude to say that i wish we could openly (and lovingly) disagree with each other more often instead of saying "what you do is alright for you"?
maybe bill is rubbing off on me too much but i think a little open dialogue might not be so bad sometimes. (maybe you should change your title back to friction fridays--is this too friction-y?)
I love your blog and am a fan now more than ever.
Don't be afraid to be yourself and to say what is on your mind.
I think sometimes Moms are WAY too hard on each other.
What works for one family might not work for yours or for mine.
Some people believe pre-school works and others believe they would like to wait.
Some are into home schooling and others are ok with public school.
Some think private christian schools work and some choose to do what they think works that might be different from that choice.
We definitely need to stop being so defensive as Moms towards Moms that do it different. I know I could take my own advice - I'm not perfect. I'm always afraid people are judging me because my Fiona is not in pre-school, etc.
Anyway.. don't be afraid to share something on your blog. People just need to realize you are sharing what is true for you on the day that you are wanting to share it.
The people that matter are the ones that take the time to get to know you for YOU. Nobody should hold what you write about against you. It's a process and who knows.. you might change your mind about something later on down the road.
[[hugs]]
- Angela Stevens
Lauren, Fiona & Kinsley's Mom
Omaha, NE
PS My blogging has been problematic for me at times but when I look back all I can do is continue to be me.
PPS My favorite adult beverage is a Heineken w/a Lime. Although I did go out to dinner with Don the other night. (We got to have a date w/no kids) I ordered a Raspberry Ice Mojito and boy was that tasty! But that's just me. :-)
Wow - lot of good comments. I never think of you as judgmental. I know you are a passionate mom who just wants to share her heart. I love that you are able to share your heart so openly with all of us who love to hear your stories...yet, when it all comes down to it...none of it is our business!! We enter your life every day just to be part of it. And you so willing keep your "door" open. Thank you. My favorite part of reading your blog is that so often I find myself chuckling and going "Oh...that's so Holly!" I love how your heart and your personality and passion come through in your writing...I can almost hear it!
I too love your blog and will enjoy reading your experiences.
I don't know that there is a right choice for every child in regards to schooling.
Wouldn't it be boring if we all did everything the same in life? Epidural, scheduled c, bottle fed, whatever it is, variety is the spice of life!
I am looking forward to reading about your homeschool journey and am still on the fence about what I'm doing with Sage (even this year, please don't judge me)!
I love your blog, Holly. My friend Jaimee introduced me to you and said, "You have to read this!" after a particularly hard day with my two little girls. She showed me your poop in the crib post first and I was hooked.
I grew up in public schools and I feel like I turned out okay. Not because I went to public school, but because I had supportive, involved parents, some terrific teachers, lots of opportunities outside school and strong church communities in my life.
I cringe to think what would happen if all believers pulled their kids out of public education. Aren't we called to be salt and light?
We are an Air Force family too. We don't get to pick where we live or how good the schools are. We choose to save for our kids' education knowing that some of that money may be for private school if we move somewhere where we don't feel public school is workable. If there's one thing motherhood has taught me, it's to never say "I'll never..." because it will come back to bite you, inevitably.
I look forward to your Friday posts! ;-)
Thanks for telling a bit of your story! I love that you loved your education. We home educate here and know it's what we are supposed to be doing...the discipleship aspect alone is amazing...let alone enjoying the process of teaching my kids to read, write, ect...
I post weekly as well...usually during the weekend at some point. I look forward to reading your posts :)
Thanks again for your honesty and transparency.
~Rose in Denver
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