Friday, October 2, 2009

the 'I don't know's' I was referring to.

1. I don't know if I'm being the best mother possible. (ok, actually, I do know the answer to this one and it's not pretty)
2. I don't know if I'm being a good friend.
3. I don't know if I'm missing something with Jesus right now that He'd want me to do.
4. I don't know how much longer we'll live here.
5. I don't know where we'll go when we move, if we move.
6. I don't know the best way to deal with Lydia's all-the-sudden-protruding-selfish-behavior.
7. I don't know if my children will ever forgive me for all the mistakes I'm making and the things I'm missing.
8. I just don't know, ya know?

What I do know:

My Redeemer LIVES.
I don't know, but HE DOES.
I know that I am fearfully and wonderfully made and that HE HAS PLANS for my life, plans to prosper me, not to harm me, plans to give me hope and a future.
I know that GRACE never runs out.
I know that LOVE PROTECTS.
I know that HE IS LOVE.
I know HE ISN'T FINISHED with Lydia yet....or me...and HE WILL COMPLETE us one day.
I know THE HOLY SPIRIT is busy, and talking, and IN LOVE with me and my friends and my family.

and because my 'I know' list is longer and made of solid truths, I'll be ok.
even if "I" don't know, it's ok because "The One in Charge" does know.

which means, I can rest....even if I don't know.

making the choice to Rest and Let Him Do His Thing today, because my 'things' aren't going well - surprise surprise.

(p.s. if you're looking for a good heart cleansing - go to 1 Cor 13:4-7 and insert "mommy" for every time it says LOVE, yikes.)


Stacy said...

Philippians 4:8...whatsoever good...thing on THESE things.

I've taken this to heart lately when my mind is wandering, doubting and fearing.

Because THESE things...always have to do with how big God is and what He is doing!

heather said...

wow, great post Holly. I always appreciate you being so real on your blog. I saw a LOT of similarities with your 'i don't knows' in my own life, and my pride always gets in the way of actually admitting them.
One of the worst things to hear is how selfish I can be, so maybe being more real on my blog is something I need to do, since it is a window into my world.

Isn't it funny how God can use other people to speak into your own life? I love that!

Thanks for being one of those people! : )