Thursday, March 29, 2012

oldie but a goody

can't get this song out of my head this week (not that I'm trying or anything!)

especially these two phrases:

Captivate us Lord Jesus with You.
Devastate us with YOUR PRESENCE.

"Devastate me with Your presence" has become sort of a prayer for my week and this morning during a journaling and reading session of Romans, He did just that.

One of my biggest 'take aways' from the women's retreat I went on a few weeks ago was this:

I have had deeper, more meaningful 'mountain top' experiences at my kitchen table lately than I have at any conference, speech, retreat or ______.
That came as a surprise to me.
I think I actually, at one point not really known, came to rely on those conference/retreat moments to keep my fires goin'.

Not anymore.

I love that.

I love that Jesus meets me over coffee, every. single. morning and devastates me right THERE.

Not sayin' that I always get to meet with Him, just sayin' that when I do it's a 'mountain top experience' every time.

I mean, this morning was so powerful I spent most of the time in 'devastated' tears.
Healing, refreshing, humbling tears.

I didn't cry once at the 'retreat'.
I sobbed at my kitchen table over God's presence.

That makes sense though, 'cause I don't like to retreat...I like to advance.
That's no secret ;-).

Loving my newly dubbed 'kitchen table moments'.
Loving my new prayer to 'be devastated with His presence'.
Loving how God is working in my life right now.....

It's quiet.
It's that gentleness I've prayed for in my life since Jr. High

No joke, at 14 I underlined every verse in my Bible with the word 'gentle'....still usin' the same Bible.  Still stop and dwell over those verses every time, wondering if I'm ever going to understand what it means.
I don't think anyone would EVER describe me as gentle, even if you only met me for 5 seconds. Gentle wouldn't even enter your subconscious, let alone anywhere else in your brain.  Always knew this about myself.

15....20 years later....I think I see a glimpse.
Of HIS gentleness......through the work in my life.
Through this quiet season in my heart.

What I didn't expect was for the Gentleness to be so Powerful.

Seeing what God is doing  through the gentle work in my life be Magnified with His power in others lives is what is causing those awe striking 'kitchen table moments' right now.

I'm getting it.
I'm getting that Gentleness can almost be likened to Humility.
Humility can be likened to just gettin' outta the dang way and watching God do His thang.

I don't know what else to say here....didn't even plan on writing that...just came to post the song.
Maybe you should listen to it again!?


Courtney said...

"What I didn't expect was for the Gentleness to be so Powerful."

love that!


Peyton said...

I would 100% describe you as gentle. For sure. Love this post.

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