....not really.
I just haven't had the best of weeks here people.
Jake has his interview a few weeks ago (yes, for this particular job in the military you have to interview, I know, it sounds weird) he was told they'd make a decision by early Oct.
Another guy we know interviewed and they told him, middle of Oct.
Both guys said the interviews themselves were odd.
The place, apparently, needs some one RIGHT NOW but is acting totally different.
Almost every day we get some little clue or mysterious comment on the process.
All fine and well until you move to my routine.
It is messing with my routine.
This is unacceptable people.
It's 'disturbing my calm' (a new quote of mine that I stole from the movie Serenity).
It, and not just it, but it is making me grumpy.
I am totally cool with moving, I am totally cool with not moving, I am totally cool with moving somewhere that hasn't even been on our radar yet, what I'm NOT cool with is having no stinkin' clue.
No clue...except mysterious ones, of course.
It's an awkward place.
I have a relationships that if I were going to stay I'd invest more time in and I have projects that if I were going to stay, I'd start (it's a long list too).
And these are not projects that I can just start and if we move, oh well, they are big ones.
I know, there is a reason.....I have been told this and I know this and I am already seeing this....but, from the time we heard of the first opportunity down 'there' it's been several months and that's a long time to not know, to just live and move on, that's a long time and it's disturbing my calm. ;-)
I like to know. I like surprises.
I do not like to be in the middle.
I feel like we are in a heated game of 'keep away'
not only are we in the middle but we can see what it is that's been kept away!
So, there you go - and from all that trickles very weird long days for me.
There's a bigger picture and more to do here, so, I will, once again, do my best to brush off and move on until we move from the keep away game.
The Mommy and Daddy
(aka Holly and Jake, but only sometimes)
Our Lydia
Our Samantha
Our Lenora
Our Sophie
4 comments:
One of the hardest things is being in limbo. Will pray for you as you wait. One day at a time....
we had to wait a whole year to find out where (and if) bill would be accepted to any school. add to that the fact that i couldn't talk to ANYONE about the possible move (except our parents) so i had to pretend to everyone that i would be around. wow. that was a pretty rough year . . . i hope your "not knowing" is over quickly!
Oh Holly I'm finding such a kindred spirit in you! We've moved 8 times in 8 years and it just never ends. We are CONSTANTLY in the where next and how long mode. I even paint our houses just to have to repaint a month later when I haven't even yet finished the trim. So then I don't decorate and feel so blah because I hate not decorating. Then I don't want to unpack because it seems easier just to live w/out but then I need something and have to go through 20 boxes to get to it. Then we pack and move again. Even now our house has been on the market for 5 months and Jeff is living in New York but we can't move there because we don't know if it's going to be long term! Oh by the way we moved to Vermont for 2.5 months this summer then we moved back into our house that never sold. As you so accurately stated, the worst is the living in limbo all the time. So when you find the fix to this lifestyle, please share....it's exhausting!
I'm not military so I don't understand THAT part. But the rest I do. Having a husband who lived in a different city during the week and home on the weekends for 1.5 years. Then God sending a completely different direction than where we thought we were headed. I have 2 thoughts and they are what I experienced..what I held onto and what I anchored myself to:
1) "I have plans for you" Said the Lord..."Plans to give you hope and a future..."
2) I always wondered how much I should get involved in not knowing how long I could be there, and I always felt God loving me and saying...These are my people that I need you to be involved with NOW. I will take care of them when you leave, they are mine, not yours. I know when you are leaving, so live where I have you...now...I'll take care of the rest.
Maybe that sounds crazy, but that's how I got through it. There's nothing I can say to make it better - because it sucks when you are going through it. Find that verse from God to hold onto and to cling to on those hard days - find that promise from Him that speaks to you.
In the meantime I'll pray for calm in your storm.
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