Tuesday, March 19, 2013

The answered PRAYER!!!!!

ok.
Courtney told HER story, which is really GOD'S story but it was entrusted to her for her to share.
And she did, so now you can go read it:

He is still in the business of MIRACLES!


You do need to go read that.
She says if you don't like drama that you don't have to read it.

THERE IS NO DRAMA IN THERE.

It was a miracle and so it was full of JOY, not DRAMA.

It's just not cool to be soooo JOYFUL.
It's cool to 'be cool' and I get that.....it is not dramatic, it is truth and it is so big that it seems dramatic but  actually, it's just God, being God, handing out miracles and joy.


MY SIDE:

I was one of the 11.
God asked me to fast for them for one week.
I. hate. fasting.

But, He asked and I fasted, in my own way that I felt He was telling me too.
I kept thinking, "I have the spiritual and emotional energy for this right now, she doesn't, this is where I'm supposed to be...."

I BEGGED God for two things all week:

#1 - that COURTNEY would see a miracle every day.  that it would be obvious that God was waging this war so she didn't feel like she had to hold the burden of the fight for Lincoln on her shoulders.
Every. day.  A miracle.
An encouraging, "Hey, I'm God and I AM HERE" Miracle.

#2 - that Lincoln would have a moment of true Joy.  every. day.  Joy.
He is an excited, energy filled little boy but I'm not sure he understands the peaceful joy that his new home can bring him so I felt called to pray that over him.

and then Courtney posted that she was 'ready for Thursday, bring it!'.

Friday I emailed and ask how Thursday ended up going and I got this:
(I think it's ok to share this!?)


I AM GREAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i am NOT trying to sound dramatic here. but, i woke up yesterday morning a new person. NEW. i tiptoed through the day so as not to awaken the ugly person i had become. and i was SCARED to go to bed last night, thinking "she" would be back this morning. BUT SHE WASN'T! 

holly. my heart has felt FROZEN the past 6 weeks or so. it has been awful. i can't even describe it and do it justice. i couldn't pray (i've NEVER had that happen before. it terrified me.) i KNEW all the right things...but it didn't matter. i felt DEAD inside. frozen. hardened. 

and then it was just lifted?? nothing "happened". it was just gone. my heart is soft. and joyful. and ready for whatever lincoln brings to me today. i will love him THROUGH it. i couldn't say that 2 days ago.......
......WHY did that happen? what could i have done to make it not happen? i tried to force it away - but it literally would NOT go away. i tried to fake it - but that only lasted so long. and i KNOW it was God that lifted it. but why now? i have more questions than answers. 

BUT I KNEW!!!!!!!!

here was my response:

WOW.
WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW….

THIS IS FRICKIN' AWESOME.

THIS IS THE STUFF HEAVEN IS MADE OF COURTNEY.

I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT HAS HAPPENED.

EXACTLY.

(totally dancing right now, by the way)

I am feeling useless and puny and dumb…uncool…and I'm whining about it on blog.
I am not wanting to just sit here though so I literally have been BEGGING God for you.
Interceding all day and even a few times when I had to get up to pee in the middle of the night. (TMI)

Yesterday I even was like, "um, ok God, I'm a beggin' and I see nothin' - is this not your will for this situation!?" (I'm a super mature prayer by the way…not).  But, I trusted that He had called me to fight for you and so I continued on...

I had been praying SPECIFICALLY that you would see a miracle.
A miracle that only He could be attributed for.
A miracle that would totally encourage you to remember the fight is not yours, He's got this.

And this was it Courtney.

THIS WAS IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You being GREAT - IS the MIRACLE.

I know it.

You know how sometimes you just KNOW.

I KNOW.

don't be confused.
'what's to learn'?  that you asked for prayer, we prayed, God answered.
THAT is what.
God answers.
HE IS ALIVE COURTNEY.

He is alive…..




so.
there you go.
He is alive.
She asked for prayer from those around her, we lifted her up, God heard and performed a miracle.

....and that reminded me of all the other times prayer had played a part of my life these past several years.
(Liza has been trying to tell me this for a long time now, I'm just slow!  Love you girl.)

I'm not afraid to sound cliché.
I'm not.

Prayer is amazing.
It is miraculous.

I CAN DO THAT FROM MY TABLE....MY BATHROOM.....MY CAR.....
I can do that anywhere (there needs to be a Dr. Seuss book about this!).

And I can pray with more energy and concentration and depth from my moments of peace and ease...
And I will.

I will work hard....on my knees.
I will stop wondering why our lives are so peaceful and I will pray.
And pray and pray and pray....


6 comments:

Courtney said...

thank you. thank you for providing clarity when i needed it. for praying for us so faithfully. for loving us so very much. thank you!!!

Erika C said...

love you. miss you. thankful for you as an example/mentor/friend/whatev... thankful I've had you for like 13(?) yrs and that you're still that example/mentor/friend/whatev from across the country. -e

Liza said...

Hurray!! I was hoping that your miracle had something to do with hers :)

And you're right, I can attest - you work hard on your knees and miracles happen when you do! Keep it up. Maybe this is your "fire" for the moment...

Missy said...

Love to see God work through prayers. Prayer is one of the mysterious that I can not wrap my head around, no matter how hard I try. It just boggles me. Obviously prayer for the sake of communing with God is one thing, I'm not talking about that...I'm talking about how our prayers affect the spiritual world. It. is. crazy. cool! And a total mystery. Which I love. Great story. So glad you were able to partner with Courtney in this!

Mandy said...

awesomeness.

Amber Trejo said...

So awesome! I hope I'm not a total creeper for this but I've been reading Courtney's blog for a long time and I was SO happy to read this.

Prayer works. It's so funny because I'm experiencing a miracle right now that is totally God and I know it's totally God because it's all stuff that I've spent YEARS trying to change and couldn't. Then, instead of spending all my time obsessing about what I could do, I started praying...and then other people contacted me telling me they were praying. I started feeling cautiously hopeful...then time kept moving and it seemed like nothing was happening so I figured I must've misunderstood....and then I read this, "Then the Lord said to Moses, "Has my arm lost its power? Now you will see whether or not my word comes true!" Numbers 11:23.

And suddenly, change. Change bigger than I imagined! Why!?! Because God's arm still hasn't lost its power!

I know you've always been a doer and it has made such a difference in so many lives but don't feel like you're not doing enough if all you are able to do is pray right now. That's the GREATEST thing you can do! There's a reason we call people prayer warriors.

/end rant. Sorry for hijacking your blog. This is why I don't comment that often ;)