Sundays and moving.

this is how I feel about church hunting:

I hate it and it makes me crazy.

I hate that pastors preach sermons about REALITY but then give almost no scripture to back up their points.

I hate that pastors take so much time on points like "there will be laughter in heaven", give no scripture and then spent 2 seconds on how to actually get to heaven....

I hate that I sit through whole sermons wondering how much the backdrop on the stage and the bulletin/book worth of 'welcome' papers COSTS and how much more could have been done with that $.

Yes, those light behind the pastor are pretty but did Jesus have those cool lights behind him when he was out and about preaching and teaching?  Paul? Timothy? John?  

nope.

Just a bunch of flies and dirt and noisy people.

I hate knowing that there are pastors out there preaching such watered down sermons!!!

I hate that we keep showing up to churches on THE Sunday the pastor is taking a break and just happens to not be there.

I hate shoving my kids into SO many new classes....Sunday after Sunday after Sunday they get to feel that 'new girl' feeling.  

I hate that every kid in the class got a piece of candy for bringing their Bible EXCEPT Samantha, because she was knew and didn't know that was the game.

I hate that I know that will be burned into her memory forever.

I hate knowing she came out of that class crying.

I hate that people try to find us a seat by walking us to the front of the auditorium only to see there are no seats there so we have to walk back to the back or side.  It's like a 'new people parade'.  I think I'll bring ticker-tape next Sunday.

I hate how hard music teams TRY....I wish they wouldn't, I wish they would just worship.

I hate it that I judged the group of teenage girls smoking outside the church doors instead of immediately praising God that they were even THERE.

I hate it that I always seem/act so rude to people when we are visiting because I'm always on such edge.  For reals? That is just dumb.  These are my people, I should not be on edge....

I hate telling people you're new and then being subjected to their 5 min's worth of name dropping about how many people in the church they know.  I. don't. care.

I hate it when people give me THEIR phone number...as if I'm going to pick up the phone and call a complete stranger and invite myself over.  Think about it!

I hate that we even have to make this choice - it feels wrong to choose between one group of Christians and another.

We are all brothers and sisters.

I hate that in the most overdone 'production' type of churches I feel most comfortable.

Everything is done for me there.  Sometimes the music is even sooo good, I don't have to worship...it's done for me.

ok.

I'm done.

It is hard.

So what.

God uses it all, I know that.

I cling to that, I get excited about that.

it's not all hate.

(geez, I sound messed up!...well, we knew that so no pretending now, that would be pointless)

 I do love knowing that in our two combined little towns, of 14,000 all together, there are A LOT of church goers.

We live in Northern California...in the foothills...it's where all the real hippys of Cali' go, so knowing there are Christian hippys and just Christians in so much abundance is EXCITING!

(and if they aren't Christians they are at least interested in Christian things...which is great too!)

I love knowing there are so many imperfect people in the world.

I'm so incredibly imperfect and I don't like to be lonely....

I like that sometimes we walk into a church and we don't feel it's our home but we DO feel that God's Spirit is alive and strong and working!

I love knowing that our 'home' is out there and the process God has to take us through to find it is not without purpose.

Every. single. visit. Every. single. time. we. move.  I can look back and find a reason why we visited a particular church.

I love knowing that we DO have people here.

I don't know who they are yet, or why they'll be in our lives/we'll be in their lives but I know they are there.

I know our family will have a very unique purpose here that we've never had before and our local church home will be a huge part of that.

I love knowing that I have some amazing friends from churches we just visited a few times.

We didn't stay at the church but the people stayed in our hearts!

I know all of that because He has proven so faithful all the other chapters of my life in this area.

He has never failed.

And He never will.

My attitude will (and has) already failed.

Praise God that He never has,

He will come through again on this one, 

We may be shocked, but He will answer.

Until then, I'll pull on my big girl panties.

Pray about and change my attitude.

and just keep going...