I've been trained to goal set.
I've practiced it.
I've achieved goals before.
It's January and I feel like I need a good brush up course in goal setting.
So, I do what all good stay-at-home-mama's do.
I googled it.
Write them down.
Dream a little.
Dream a lot.
Write them down.
Break them down.
5yr. 1yr. 6mo. 1mo. 1wk. 1day.
Write it down.
All great advice.
It all works.
I need some new goals.
My goals lately are good, just kinda shallow.
Ya know, goals like, 'don't kill my kids today'
or, 'don't be mean to my husband today'
or, 'only eat 1/2 the box of Oreo's instead of the whole box' (go me!).
Basically, I'm a pro.
I really have set more sophisticated goals in the past.
In sales, in fitness, in the home, in study, etc....
Some I've achieved, some I have not.
But it's the New Year and it's the time of year we all beat ourselves up for the goals we haven't achieved from last year...or the year before that....or the year before that....or....you get the picture.
Or maybe that's just what I do and you are all shaking your heads thinking, "What a looser!".
But probably not.
(I find that typically, if I'm feeling one way, there are like 1,000's of other sista's feelin' the same dang thing. (or bro's.)
I'm goin' with that for now.)
It seems like all the goals I set for this year, which are really still in the building stages, are all direct results of things I've failed at before. And I hone in on the failure and do all I can to think about how I can perfect that area instead of being a failure in that area. It consumes me sometimes....a lot of times...ok...ALL the times.
Which, when you get all philosophical about it, makes sense...you don't always feel like you need to set a goal in areas you are GOOD at....you're already there. So, it makes sense to improve in the weak areas.
But so many of my goals, deep down in my heart, are ugly and humanistic and driven by idols that are distracting me.
Should I be focusing on my failures to set new goals? Translation: Should I be focusing on myself to set new goals?
Set your mind on the things above,
Not on the things that are on earth.
I don't think I should.
They play a part, of course they play a part.
But the 'part'/the piece on the game board, that my failure is, is in GOD'S hands.
HE chooses the next direction.
Not my guilt, not me, not my own quest for perfection.
That should be obvious because if we fail in an area maybe we should be allowed to continue to make 'those' decisions anymore, maybe it needs a better, bigger, more loving 'player'.
We are the ones that go through the motions and make the decisions.
It's not magic.
Achieving goals is grit and stupid hard work.
I think I'm just wanting my goals this year to be more heaven-focused.
I think, otherwise, I might be missing some big-cool stuff.
Fine - but why?
Because I wanna be prettier or stronger?
So I look cool at Bible studies...so that I can recite the 12 tribes of Israel and blindly point to them on a map...with my hands tied behind my back...both ancient maps and modern maps?
Being silly, but really.
I have made spiritual goals before with the, maybe-a-little-subconscious-but-still-there, mindset of 'bragging rights'.
Am I making parent goals and goals for my kids so that one day someone can say, 'They were/are awesome parents, their kids behave!'. Or am I making goals that will ensure my kids know that people sin, God forgives, we forgive and we roll up our sleeves and live for Him, at. all. costs.
No matter what kind of parent that makes me look like?
(do not get me wrong, I think kids who are loved behave more time during the day than they do not....pending extreme personality types...not looking for a discussion or any opinions here...just digesting some personal goal stuff here and I have an almost tween who's tongue can get out-o-control so this subject is very fresh on my heart right now!)
I could go on....and on and on and on...but we all knew that already.
I'm looking up this year as I dream and write and break-down.
Whether I'm setting a new 'don't eat this, eat this' rule for myself, or a new exercise goal, or a new plan for the girls schooling, or a new reading my Bible goal....I want to ask myself, "WHY?",
and then proceed with the goal.
It's what started this whole thing:
Cast away thy sloth, thy lethargy, thy coldness, or whatever interferes with thy chaste and pure love to Christ. Make Him the source, the center, and the circumference of all thy soul's range of delight. Rest no longer satisfied with thy dwarfish attainments. Aspire to a higher, a nobler, a fuller life. Upward to heaven! Nearer to God! - Spurgeon (of course!)
Not many of us are living at our best. We linger in the lowlands because we are afraid to climb the mountains. The steepness and ruggedness dismay us, and so we stay in the misty valleys and do not learn the mystery of the hills. We do not know what we lost in our self-indulgence, what glory awaits us if we only we had courage forthe mountain climb, what blessings we should find if only we would move to the uplands of God. -J.R.M.
Here's to no longer being satisfied with dwarfish attainments and knowing what we've been missing in self-indulgence....